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30 pansexual American-born Chinese female, she/her pronouns, ethically non-monogamous, sex nerd, legal courtesan at Sheri’s Ranch near Las Vegas, from the East Coast, into: authentic connection, sapiosexuality, auralism, sensory play, MFM FFM threesomes, dicks, behavioral economics, ancient Greek history and literature

🔗 JESSICA LINKS | sheri's ranch profile / @jessicaxie_OXO

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00:00:00:05 - 00:00:06:15

Luna

Our guest today is a 30 year old American born Chinese female and I might add, a goddess.

00:00:06:17 - 00:00:07:05

Luna

Who is.

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Luna

Pansexual, ethnically non-monogamous and enjoys connections with both long term lovers and comic connections, new and old, who streak through her life. She is into authentic connection CPO sexuality Oralism sensory play, exchanging information especially.

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Luna

With fellow sex.

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Luna

Nerds and badass goddesses. Exploring threesomes including but not limited to MFM and FFM configurations.

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Luna

And dicks. Dicks, dicks.

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Luna

Also a lover of learning, she loved to study behavioral economics and is getting a degree in ancient Studies with a focus on Greek material culture. She also works as a legal courtesan at my favorite of all the brothels, Sheri's Ranch, which she travels to from the East Coast. Welcome, Jessica.

00:00:51:09 - 00:00:53:07

Luna

Xie.

00:00:53:09 - 00:00:57:19

Jessica

Thank you so much, Luna. I'm really, really excited to be here to chat with you.

00:00:57:21 - 00:01:18:13

Luna

I am so excited to have you here to chat with me before we get to all of your naughty, sexy details. I would like our lovely community to get to know you as a human the way that I have. So start off by telling us in general what makes you go woo! What are you excited about? What do you love?

00:01:18:14 - 00:01:24:20

Luna

How do you have fun? What brings you big, huge joy and not dicks yet? We're going to get to that later.

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Jessica

We'll get to dicks. We always get to dicks.

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Luna

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Jessica

You touched on a lot of my, like, special interests. I love, love, love learning and connection. That's what gets me excited about everything. A lot of emotional investment in things. But in terms of hobbies and, like, what I do for fun, I'm a huge nerd. I really enjoy tabletop role playing games like Dungeons and Dragons.

00:02:05:16 - 00:02:36:09

Jessica

No longer white wolf. It's Onyx Path publishing, but World of Darkness. I also really enjoy, anime and manga. I am a huge foodie. I cook because I like to eat, and I craft a little bit here and there, some crocheting, some jewelry making. Plus, I sing in the shower when nobody's around.

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Luna

Only when.

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Luna

Nobody's around.

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Jessica

Unless I'm dragged up for karaoke.

00:02:41:11 - 00:02:51:13

Luna

Okay, I'm gonna say, I think I have a new goal of, like, hearing you sing in the shower. Is that a creepy goal? It better look you stick.

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Luna

You're great. It's it's it's your own private concert hall. Can we go two clicks back? And I would love to hear specifics of.

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Luna

What you love to cook and what you love to eat.

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Jessica

I grew up in a Chinese-American household, and so we always had kind of like a smorgasbord of food. But I really, really love Asian food. Particularly things that I ate growing up. I'm still working on my culinary skills. I have to say, my sister is far superior, and I would much rather eat my sister's food. But,

00:03:31:08 - 00:03:36:08

Luna

Same with my sister, the chef. Also, I do think that eating other people's food in general.

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Luna

Is extra delicious.

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Luna

Unless they get mad about it, I won't do that. But, if there shares. Oh, that's. I feel so loved. If someone shares food with me and I love to share food too.

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Jessica

There's a thing that my family says food is care. So if you're cooking for somebody or you're sharing a meal together, like it's showing that you you care about what is nourishing them. Plus there's the whole like connection aspect that when you are taking time with someone and talking and enjoying an activity together, whether that's the cooking or the eating or the conversation, like it's all kind of this big, warm package.

00:04:20:17 - 00:04:50:22

Jessica

It's like a hug. But to get back to your question, I really like cooking Chinese dishes that I had growing up. So like steamed fish or, char siu or or pan fried noodles. Lots of things I want to learn how to make. But something my sister taught me recently was Hand-pulled Noodles, which at some point when we are on tour together, I will have to make for you.

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Luna

Yes! Oh my gosh.

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Luna

Oh my gosh. I want to make them with you there is a place in Vegas called Magic Noodle which I love the name of, and I love just like watching them stretch them out and they have. And then there's like a kind where they like, scrape them off. And so, I love noodles, I love noodles, I love noodles.

00:05:07:07 - 00:05:27:01

Luna

I love all, all forms of noodle. Okay, okay. All the noodle and I, I do agree with you. The the connection is nourishment, but it's nourishment on all levels, right? Like that continuous thing. It's so, so okay, so continuing this theme, I would love to hear a little bit about self-love. It sounds like cooking is part of that.

00:05:27:01 - 00:05:32:21

Luna

Sounds like maybe engaging in things you love is part of that. But how do you will you.

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Jessica

I I'm still figuring it out, but I think that's a good thing. So it's a continuous process for me. Journaling is part of it. Being reflective. Also, I'm working on self-compassion and warmth. So treating myself like I would one of my very, very dear friends. It's hard to do sometimes, isn't it? But I think taking time for myself and sitting with thoughts, meditating, listening to music, that's all part of my package.

00:06:10:09 - 00:06:18:14

Luna

Yeah. Do you have any, like, sensual go to like for me, for example, put me a hot tub or a bath or a spa and I'm like.

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Jessica

Oh. It's not exactly. I guess it is sensual. It's sensual, not sexual. I love getting massages. Yeah, it's just I turn into putty. Yeah. I also get acupuncture, which can be very relaxing, but can also be very like stimulating. Yeah. I at some point want to go to a head spa. I don't know if you've seen these trends, but a lot of them are, you know, Asian owned and based in like traditional homeopathic medicine where your hair gets like this lovely bath, and you get like a scalp massage and a neck massage and there's just aromatherapy.

00:07:11:22 - 00:07:17:01

Jessica

So it's just a pleasant all around thing that I, I really want to try.

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Luna

Yeah.

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Luna

As I'm hearing you talk to, I'm like, oh, but it's a gateway drug. Because if I want that, then I'm going to want more like which I am. It's it's not a sexual experience, but I'm like, well, and I might as well go to a K spa and get that in my scrub and then and then go to the massage part, I don't know.

00:07:34:12 - 00:07:51:05

Luna

Yes. Oh, good. Yes. And I love what you said too, about it being an ever evolving process. Right. Like maybe the better way to ask this question is how do you woo you today or right now or what's unfolding? And I think you illustrated that beautifully, because I noticed that for me too, it changes constantly. Right. Like this is not a set answer.

00:07:51:05 - 00:08:06:20

Luna

Or if I take a bath too many nights in a row, which I do because I conserve water. And so I, I leave it as a treat for myself so that it does have kind of that heightened the specialness, you know, or if I'm, I travel for weeks at a time. So then when I come home, I'm like my bathtub.

00:08:08:11 - 00:08:10:01

Luna

Yay.

00:08:10:03 - 00:08:24:01

Luna

And I love it. Sounds like you are just carving out that time and bringing consciousness to it, you know? So I would like to know now how do you like to be wooed? Tell us some of the ways that you like to receive love, affection and care.

00:08:24:03 - 00:09:10:22

Jessica

So the biggest things for me are time and attention. I love quality time. I love physical touch. But if you are choosing to spend your time with me, then I feel so valued and appreciated and I really like having shared experiences and sometimes those shared experiences are just sitting on the couch, naked together, cuddled up like it's yeah, I love fun and intimate, but I'm a pretty simple gal.

00:09:11:00 - 00:09:17:20

Jessica

I just like knowing that you want to be with me. I like that's what I enjoy.

00:09:17:22 - 00:09:32:16

Luna

I love that you gave a definition of quality for you because it's different. Like when I first was like quality time. Well, what does that mean? Word, that affirmation. I don't want words of I want. For me, quality time includes words of.

00:09:32:16 - 00:09:35:13

Luna

Information is kind of what I've realized, you know.

00:09:35:13 - 00:09:36:22

Luna

Like, I love to connect, I love to new.

00:09:37:02 - 00:09:41:00

Luna

And also, oh, I just got a warm and fuzzy feeling into now.

00:09:41:00 - 00:09:48:06

Luna

You are spending your time here with me. Does it go both directions? I know for some people, gift giving and receiving. Okay, now I feel extra special.

00:09:48:08 - 00:09:51:17

Luna

Okay. That's nice.

00:09:51:17 - 00:10:08:15

Luna

And I and I love you know, for me two quality time is not sitting around with people I love where we're all on our phones like that for me, does not count. I know some people. That is enough for them. And I love that they know that about themselves and that they can ask for it explicitly. Hopefully. You know, for me.

00:10:08:15 - 00:10:10:01

Luna

Like you said, I would rather be.

00:10:10:01 - 00:10:32:12

Luna

Naked, get that oxytocin flowing, be have cuddles, you know, and I also have run into issues with friends and lovers. Will specifically a friend who was a lover in the past where we had a disagreement about, like what? Chillin together. And I'm saying that with air quotes means, you know, he was like, could you just stop talking? And I was like, well, I but yes, I can.

00:10:32:14 - 00:10:37:02

Luna

And now I'm sad, like, you know. So.

00:10:37:10 - 00:10:57:14

Luna

And that's not to say that it always has to be talking all the time, but just feeling like there is space for me to be myself and finding that vibe and not in sickness, I think is yes, is huge, you know, are there other ways that you like to be wooed, like, or things in the past that as you reflect, just like really made you melt?

00:10:57:16 - 00:11:34:10

Jessica

I mean, we'll get to the some of the spicier stuff later, okay. Right. But one of the things that makes me melt is I'm in into oralism. It's something that I've found a word for very recently, but I really enjoy hearing someone else's voice, particularly if it's very gentle and quiet and close to my ear. Like feeling the breath and having it kind of wash over me that makes me feel like we're in sync.

00:11:34:12 - 00:11:52:21

Luna

I love that. When do you feel the most connected to other humans? You've already given some good examples, but what textural quality makes you actually have the experience of I am connected.

00:11:52:23 - 00:12:24:08

Jessica

So the exchange of information where there's often not always, often eye contact, engaged body language. I can feel myself leaning into you, through the screen. So I really love learning. And sometimes that learning is like a topic or about a specific item or a collection. But most often I find it's learning about someone else and myself.

00:12:24:10 - 00:12:32:08

Luna

I want to share something with you. I don't know if I've shared this with you already. And maybe it'll make you feel connected. It makes me feel connected.

00:12:32:08 - 00:12:35:12

Luna

Because it is a piece of information I'm about to exchange with you.

00:12:35:14 - 00:13:00:18

Luna

My awareness of the fact that I connect through information exchange in my brain is linked with you, and I don't know if it's because I discovered it through telling you that, or if it was like the week we met is when I discovered it. I think those discoveries came hand-in-hand, like it might have even been. I remember the first moment we met and I was like, tell me if I talk too much because I like to connect through exchange of information.

00:13:00:18 - 00:13:13:04

Luna

And I think since then it's a thing that I've been saying because I'm like, whoa, that's really true. And then your reflection of like, no. Yes, me too. Let's do it. I was like, you know, I read it in a book a few years ago. And I was like, yeah, yeah, I think that, but but it just like locked in.

00:13:13:04 - 00:13:15:07

Luna

So I actually associate.

00:13:15:12 - 00:13:20:15

Luna

Information exchange in the name of connection with you.

00:13:20:17 - 00:13:24:20

Jessica

In my head, I just found you and my body just went.

00:13:24:22 - 00:13:27:07

Luna

Okay.

00:13:27:09 - 00:14:04:12

Jessica

Yes. I associate information exchange with you like that, that phrase. And recognizing that that's a part of myself, like, I've always just kind of put it as I love learning, but it is it's sharing information together that I find really exciting. Because I don't get me wrong, I love reading, I like videos and podcasts, of course. But having something in real time with another human being is what gets me going.

00:14:04:17 - 00:14:24:11

Luna

It makes sense. I mean, it's connection based learning, and it's like if we are connection fiends, which I think you and I both are, it makes total sense. Okay. Wow. Any other connection things? I mean, we'll get to the touches, parts. I know that's a thing for both of us, but, Yeah. Any other, like, broad strokes now it's actually.

00:14:24:13 - 00:14:27:05

Luna

But I mean it. Yes and.

00:14:27:05 - 00:14:51:13

Jessica

No. I talk through TV shows and movies and all sorts of things. I don't like going to the movie theater. I much prefer being at home because, one of my partners will just pause whatever we're watching and we get to sit and, like, talk it through. There's, this show called Married at First Sight.

00:14:51:15 - 00:15:13:22

Luna

I haven't watched reality TV in almost a decade because I briefly was producing and directing online reality television with pickup artists. And so seeing how the sausage is made and also like understanding the behind the scenes things and it's like, honestly, I think a lot of it is pretty fucking unethical. And then they're not making it, you know, they're making it to trigger amygdala and like poking at people.

00:15:13:22 - 00:15:30:10

Luna

And so then I my little ethical heart is like, oh no, oh, it's not teaching the world to be a sexier, more loving place. It's creating a ship show for spectacle. Oh, God. You know, but but now I'm like, oh, but watching it. And then the next time I tried to watch reality TV was love on the spectrum because people like you would love it.

00:15:30:10 - 00:15:34:17

Luna

You will see yourself. And I was like, this is fucking.

00:15:34:17 - 00:15:39:18

Luna

Atrocious and rude. Like, like given their help.

00:15:39:20 - 00:15:58:17

Luna

People don't just okay, I mean, that's just my I know a lot of people really, really like it. Like so many people who I love and care for genuinely thought that I would have a good time, you know? But whatever. I have my own, clearly my own little baggage around reality TV. But now I'm like, we should watch something together and just pause and record.

00:15:58:17 - 00:16:03:15

Luna

Or anything about the noodles that come out of it. Anyway, future future projects. I, you know, I want.

00:16:03:15 - 00:16:13:12

Luna

To do that with movies. I want to do that with TV because I'm trying to understand what other people are seeing, and I get a lot of reflections that are like thinking too hard. And I'm like, well, I'm just noodling.

00:16:13:12 - 00:16:13:21

Jessica

It's been.

00:16:13:22 - 00:16:15:07

Luna

A dream to try to understand.

00:16:15:07 - 00:16:17:17

Luna

People here.

00:16:17:18 - 00:16:18:16

Jessica

Yes.

00:16:18:18 - 00:16:32:20

Luna

Okay, so I'm hearing that being able to talk through things and it sounds like it sounds like if I'm understanding processing, maybe the connections or relationships that you're seeing on screen is a part of that desire there.

00:16:32:22 - 00:16:59:00

Jessica

Yes, 100%. I'm also a big brother watcher. I won't go so far as to say I'm a super fan because I can't quote all of the statistics, but the thing that I find most fascinating is the interpersonal dynamics. So there's there's a lot of fodder for thought and reality TV, I think. And I obviously don't have your background in it.

00:16:59:18 - 00:17:03:17

Jessica

And I'm something I want to probe more into. I mean.

00:17:03:19 - 00:17:15:21

Luna

In the future casting and the producing process, like, they are really amazing arcs that go up and down. And I'm so sorry to pop everyone's bubble, but, it's it's not all natural.

00:17:15:23 - 00:17:19:01

Luna

Oh, yes. Well, it's not actually.

00:17:19:01 - 00:17:19:17

Jessica

Reality.

00:17:19:22 - 00:17:46:04

Luna

I, I will say I am a big fan. Not that it's, neutral. There's no such thing. Right. Any, any co-creation has lenses because just like the nature of our existence in the world, we're all projecting, giving and receiving information. But that's why I really love documentary style stuff, you know? And it's not that. It's not a narrative shaped like we're shaping your narrative here together today with our curiosity and you're sharing and my questions.

00:17:46:04 - 00:18:16:15

Luna

But like, I'm like, let's just try to represent them as they see themselves. You know, again, being a human is so imperfect. There's no such thing as communicating, quote unquote, clearly. But there's best efforts. And that's why I think dialog is such a wonderful tool. Okay. So now tell us, what does it take for you to want to take a connection that you feel with someone and make it intimate?

00:18:16:17 - 00:18:49:07

Jessica

This is going to sound very simple, but I think the realization of it is a lot more complicated. I want to feel desired, not necessarily objectified, which like has its own place, but really seen. Yeah, that that makes me feel good and excited and ready to get intimate.

00:18:49:09 - 00:19:05:05

Luna

I love that I'm like, see all of me, let me know. Like signal to me that you see me and you can objectify me. Like let me know that you know and perceive me as an entire being so that I can be your nasty little fuckboy.

00:19:05:07 - 00:19:27:06

Jessica

I feel like I need a really good reason to connect intimately, that I want to feel valued. And that's an important part of building up to what we can have together.

00:19:27:07 - 00:19:33:10

Luna

Yeah, yeah, I'm like good vibes and show me that you care. Show me. Yeah. Tell me how much.

00:19:33:10 - 00:19:43:01

Luna

Woo me. Give me an irresistible invitation. Because I like to say yeah. Woo me so I can go woo!

00:19:43:03 - 00:20:05:12

Luna

Okay, so in that vein, tell us a little bit about your health and safety practices. You are an ethically non-monogamous person. You are also a professional. So what are your standards like here. And are you usually the leader of these conversations? Does it turn you on if someone else leads them? Like just tell us a little bit about your health and safety needs.

00:20:05:13 - 00:20:41:08

Jessica

Absolutely. So I think this is a really, really important topic, both for me personally as someone who's ethically non-monogamous and as a professional, but also like for people in the wide world, I get tested outside of the brothel for my own peace of mind. I also use protection that can be in the form of male condoms, female condoms, dental dams, or my preferences, morals, things like that.

00:20:41:08 - 00:21:13:15

Jessica

For a physical barrier from STIs. I also use birth control as an extra safety measure. For both me and my partners, we have an agreement not to get me pregnant. And that's something that I want for myself and that they want for themselves in terms of time. At the brothel, I, along with the other, legal courtesans there, get tested every week.

00:21:13:17 - 00:21:18:20

Jessica

So if you see us at the ranch, we are clear and ready to go.

00:21:19:01 - 00:21:25:01

Luna

And then what about in terms of at the ranch, when you see clients like, what sort of considerations do you have there?

00:21:25:07 - 00:21:43:20

Jessica

It's very important that we keep our fluid separate so we can have lots of fun and also comply with state and federal regulations. It also makes kissing, which I thoroughly enjoy, extra, extra special.

00:21:44:00 - 00:22:06:04

Luna

Okay, so I'm hearing barriers. I'm hearing avoiding a fluid exchange. If you are at work, I am hearing regular testing both in and out of work. What's what about the actual conversations that you have with your partners, whether it's for work or play, or do you feel a big distinction between work and play when it comes to those conversations?

00:22:06:04 - 00:22:13:02

Luna

Like, what do you need to discuss with someone in order to feel comfy to get intimate?

00:22:13:04 - 00:22:54:00

Jessica

What exactly I discuss with each partner? Work and play kind of depends on the relationship that we've built up. Or I guess more succinctly, it depends on what kind of kinks we're exploring together. Okay. But in general, I make sure that we have some kind of safeword, or we use a red, yellow, green system so that we can, in the moment, communicate with each other easily and smoothly.

00:22:54:02 - 00:23:02:22

Jessica

What we're enjoying and, what we might be willing to explore further, but maybe at a later point.

00:23:03:12 - 00:23:12:07

Luna

I love that. So for anyone listening who maybe hasn't used a red yellow green system, well first I want to clarify. Do you do that also in vanilla relationships. Because I've.

00:23:12:11 - 00:23:13:04

Jessica

Absolutely.

00:23:13:10 - 00:23:18:10

Luna

Oh okay. So tell us what your red is. Tell us what you're yellow is. Tell us what green means.

00:23:18:12 - 00:23:21:07

Jessica

It kind of depends on the person.

00:23:21:09 - 00:23:27:05

Luna

So you define this with each partner. That seems confusing and hard. So you just like know person to person.

00:23:27:07 - 00:23:58:07

Jessica

I do my best, okay. And that's also why I think the system is so helpful. Because if I think that maybe my partner is into one thing and they say, oh, yellow, then I know that I should pull back and slow it down a little bit. Or if they say red, I can full stop and check in with them, make sure that they're okay.

00:23:58:08 - 00:24:00:22

Jessica

I see. So the emotional and the general.

00:24:00:22 - 00:24:15:14

Luna

Outlines are exactly like a traffic light, but the specifics of what each go slow down stop means is different. So it is. It is the same in that we are all the same as human beings, but it is different in that we all have our own different details. Okay, okay. That's that. Questions. Okay.

00:24:15:14 - 00:24:45:23

Jessica

Gotcha. Yeah. So I use a red yellow green to do things in real time. I make sure that my partners know what that means, that if I say yellow, I need a little bit more lead up or maybe even some conversation to make sure that what I'm looking for and what they're looking for are matching. But if it's green, then that is a oh yes, do that more please.

00:24:45:23 - 00:24:51:16

Luna

Now green. I need green.

00:24:51:18 - 00:24:53:05

Luna

Yes.

00:24:53:07 - 00:24:57:06

Jessica

I won't say I haven't used degree in that way before.

00:24:57:09 - 00:25:05:14

Luna

I love it, I love it. I have the phrase screaming green suddenly has a new connotation now that it was ever phrased before. But I'm like this. We're making it a phrase no.

00:25:05:16 - 00:25:16:22

Luna

No, no, let's scream green. Formerly associated with envy. Now it's associate with a good, great love in okay. Do you have any.

00:25:16:22 - 00:25:23:09

Luna

Other thoughts on love or reflections on relationship or wisdom on woohoo, or anything else about health and safety?

00:25:23:11 - 00:25:25:18

Jessica

Oh, wisdom is heavy.

00:25:25:19 - 00:25:28:02

Luna

Okay, what about wisdom?

00:25:28:04 - 00:25:31:04

Luna

Wisdom is heavy. Just some wisdom.

00:25:31:06 - 00:25:50:01

Jessica

Okay? My wisdom. I love communication in all its forms, whether it's verbal, nonverbal, sexual, platonic. So I think personally, I think the best way to connect is by communicating. Just go go go.

00:25:50:07 - 00:25:56:12

Luna

Yeah, I know everyone has their different ways, but I sure love words. Then again, once I get to the body parts like.

00:25:56:14 - 00:25:59:01

Luna

Literal body parts, then it's smooth.

00:25:59:01 - 00:26:02:13

Luna

But I need to have enough words to get to the body parts. Personally.

00:26:02:16 - 00:26:03:05

Jessica

Exactly.

00:26:03:09 - 00:26:26:18

Luna

I love that. Yeah, I love that. Okay, if you had to rate yourself on a sexual shame meter with ten being so full of shame and zero being like, I don't have any shame, where do you feel today, right now, in this moment and when? If ever does your shame coaster get squiggly, or when has it gotten squiggly over the years?

00:26:26:18 - 00:26:33:04

Luna

Like tell us about your relationship to shame, specifically sexually speaking.

00:26:33:06 - 00:27:05:13

Jessica

Specifically sexually. Okay. So in general, my shimmer meter is about a zero. It does spike from like a two to a five. If I'm not sure that the person that I'm speaking with is comfortable. So like, I guess it's less of a, it's less of a shame and more of a like I'm uncomfortable because I really, really don't want to make somebody else uncomfortable.

00:27:05:13 - 00:27:07:10

Luna

So relatable. Yeah.

00:27:07:12 - 00:27:24:13

Jessica

In general, like if I, if I feel comfy with the other person and that they won't be upset with talking about sex or having sex, it's hard. Zero. Yeah. Negative.

00:27:24:15 - 00:27:25:23

Luna

Yeah.

00:27:26:01 - 00:27:54:18

Jessica

But I grew up in a pretty conservative household okay. And we did not talk about sex. Okay. Like at all. But I think I've been a very sexual being from a very young age. So even though we didn't talk about it in my family, the internet is a wonderful thing. And so that's where I did my learning.

00:27:54:20 - 00:28:04:23

Luna

Okay. So take us through your personal sex education, starting with when you first remember hearing about sex. It sounds like you did not get a sex talk.

00:28:05:01 - 00:28:06:00

Luna

No.

00:28:06:02 - 00:28:33:03

Jessica

Okay. My first exposure to sex was surprise, surprise in a book I was reading tomorrow. Pearce's song of the lioness quartet, one of my favorite series. Still. And there was a sex scene in it, and I was pretty young. Okay.

00:28:33:09 - 00:28:35:16

Luna

Yeah. How young do you think? If you had to guess.

00:28:35:18 - 00:28:59:14

Jessica

I was just over ten. Okay. But that's also like when sex ed starts going in public education. And the area that I grew up and then more explicit and detailed sex was in Harry Potter fanfiction.

00:28:59:16 - 00:29:04:00

Luna

Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

00:29:04:02 - 00:29:12:05

Luna

Oh, and you're you're five years younger than me. I was the same age as Harry. Like growing up. Like when the first book came out, we were the same Harry meeting Harry, you know.

00:29:12:07 - 00:29:13:17

Luna

You mean. So you're 18.

00:29:13:17 - 00:29:20:22

Luna

So you already had books out. When did you remember when you started reading Harry Potter and when you started reading the fanfiction? That was sexy.

00:29:21:00 - 00:29:43:20

Jessica

So I started reading Harry Potter in fifth grade. I had seen movies before, because I have older siblings, but I started reading the Harry Potter series in fifth grade when I was really sick with the flu, and there was a giant book sitting next to me. So I was like, okay, I guess I'll fill my time, read it in a day.

00:29:43:22 - 00:30:00:18

Jessica

It was the fifth book out of order as usual. Oh wow. And I want to say when I could roll off the couch and was no longer sick with the flu was when I started looking for Harry Potter erotica.

00:30:00:18 - 00:30:08:08

Luna

Wait, so you had already learned from the other book that erotica was a thing, but you? When did you learn to use the internet to look for it?

00:30:08:13 - 00:30:12:03

Jessica

Probably that year. Okay, so I was in fifth grade.

00:30:12:05 - 00:30:20:22

Luna

Wow. Okay. So you knew to look for it you were having sex ed in school or did that? It's approximately ish.

00:30:21:00 - 00:30:37:06

Jessica

Your biological sex was fourth grade. Fifth grade was. This is the other biological sex. And then sixth grade was kind of like, this is how sex happens, which was not terribly informative.

00:30:37:12 - 00:30:55:05

Luna

Okay. Yeah. I'm like, wow, I did not get that. We only had reproductive. It is so wild to me too, that they split up. Girls and boys perceived girls and boys for these lessons when they didn't have anything arousing or erotic in them. I'm like, it's not even like.

00:30:55:05 - 00:31:01:03

Luna

You're teaching us the good stuff. Like, I thought I was going to get some real, like, feminine wisdom here. No. You want to.

00:31:01:03 - 00:31:14:21

Luna

Show me a weird video? Okay. Did you learn anything? Were you aroused yourself? Like, when did you start exploring your own body? Was it pre fanfiction post like at what point did you get physically intimately curious?

00:31:14:23 - 00:31:20:11

Jessica

I would say first sex scene in Tamara Pierce's book.

00:31:20:13 - 00:31:21:08

Luna

Okay.

00:31:21:10 - 00:31:32:16

Jessica

That was like, well, I have parts. I can do things with parts. And there was definitely some like exploration of my own body.

00:31:32:21 - 00:31:34:06

Luna

Okay.

00:31:34:08 - 00:32:07:22

Jessica

Yeah. So that was that was fun. But I didn't start, like doing anything with anyone until I went to say summer after sixth grade was my first kiss just a kiss. Summer after eighth grade was a makeout. And then another one. My family and I had went to Italy, and I think my sibling was in the bathroom at a church.

00:32:08:00 - 00:32:18:18

Jessica

I could still see this church steps. And there was this really cute Italian boy. And we like we're hard core making out on the steps of a church.

00:32:18:20 - 00:32:23:08

Luna

We was other family nearby or just your sibling was in the bathroom. Parents were nowhere to be.

00:32:23:08 - 00:32:43:14

Jessica

My siblings in the bathroom and my parents were at a museum. So my sister is several years older than I am, so we were allowed to roam by ourselves a little bit. Not for a whole day, but like several hours at a time. And Rome, I.

00:32:43:14 - 00:32:47:10

Luna

Did she me okay.

00:32:47:12 - 00:33:09:12

Luna

Wow. How did that come up? Were you just, like, making eyes and then you were making out. Yeah, I love it. Okay, okay. So when did you start getting into, like, sexy partner to play? What was that unfolding? What were those learnings like for you and did you have friends that talked about it, or were you mostly just learning from books and or internet, or did you get a sister lesson?

00:33:09:18 - 00:33:13:06

Jessica

No. Okay. No, we didn't talk about sex.

00:33:13:08 - 00:33:21:20

Luna

Oh, I gave my sister the whole download of everything I knew once I had information. Like, at first I was like, sorry, babe, I don't have data yet. And then as soon as I got to my I'm like, okay, let me.

00:33:21:20 - 00:33:26:08

Luna

Tell you quickly.

00:33:26:10 - 00:33:49:01

Jessica

Yeah. My sister had, a boyfriend in high school, and like, I vaguely knew that they did stuff the advice that they gave me later when I was in high school was, if you have sex after. And I was like, okay.

00:33:49:03 - 00:33:55:05

Jessica

But it's important advice and not something that, like, comes up during sex ed.

00:33:55:07 - 00:34:11:09

Luna

Not necessarily. Yeah. I mean, I even read it in the vagina Bible. I think she was like, no, it's not that important. I know it's very important for some people. For me, I can definitely not pee. And it doesn't matter. But I know that for some people really, they don't pee. They will get a UTI like that. So yeah.

00:34:11:10 - 00:34:16:10

Luna

Okay. It's me. Yeah. Damn, damn. Yeah. Okay. I mean, these are important things to know. Yeah.

00:34:16:16 - 00:34:46:09

Jessica

I was really sick in high school, like an ongoing condition. So when I went out, I went up all out. And so I got sick freshman year of high school, and I met some friends who were not my, like, friends at the high school that I went to or my local high school. And I lied to my parents.

00:34:46:11 - 00:35:07:14

Jessica

Oops. And said I was going to stay over cousins house and then went partying with these people. And I think my first high school party, I got like pretty drunk. But my first high school party, I blew like ten guys. Wow.

00:35:07:14 - 00:35:27:09

Luna

What was that the first time that you, like, had fooled around with. Whoa, wait, so how did you watch porn? How did you even know what blowjobs were like? Did they just in? Were they just, like, put it in your mouth? I'm like, I'll try that. Because that was kind of how my first blowjob was. I mean, we instant messaged about it first and then I was like, I would put a penis in my mouth.

00:35:27:09 - 00:35:33:00

Luna

Sure, I'll try it. Like I'm I'm curious. And it was only years later that I was like, oh, it's oral sex. It's that's oral.

00:35:33:02 - 00:35:41:14

Luna

I did it, you know, I'm not only just doing blowjobs.

00:35:41:16 - 00:35:46:13

Luna

Like, wait, wait wait. So, okay, sorry, we've totally the tip.

00:35:46:15 - 00:35:51:10

Luna

I want to have ten at once. Were they lined up or was it like one after the other? Was it like what was it like?

00:35:51:10 - 00:36:00:15

Jessica

Okay, so it was like a big raucous high school party in some very wealthy person's house.

00:36:00:17 - 00:36:01:11

Luna

Wow.

00:36:01:13 - 00:36:03:00

Luna

I never got to go to one of those.

00:36:03:02 - 00:36:05:15

Jessica

That was not my family. Let's be clear. Yeah.

00:36:05:17 - 00:36:10:23

Luna

No, no. These were. You're not good girlfriends. Not your school for this year. People that you snuck.

00:36:10:23 - 00:36:12:15

Luna

Out with, friends. Oh, yes.

00:36:12:18 - 00:36:37:14

Jessica

Exactly. So, yeah, it was like drinking and like dancing, dirty dancing, grinding, you know, all the all the things. And then somebody would catch my eye, like, make eye contact, glance towards a staircase. We'd go up to a bedroom and I had blown not safe sex practices.

00:36:37:16 - 00:36:59:12

Luna

Early on I didn't either. No. Also, it took me like a decade to figure out how to use condoms for oral sex with randos. You know, like, I didn't even know that was like a thing, so. Right. Which now I fucking love blowjobs with condoms because also it makes blowjobs without condoms extra special, you know, like all of this.

00:36:59:16 - 00:37:09:21

Luna

And then I get to feel like safer. Sweatier. Okay. Sweet. So were you swallowing, like, did you did you know to do were you feeling very confident? Like, what was the vibe of it for you?

00:37:09:23 - 00:37:13:04

Jessica

So are we at the texting sex part?

00:37:13:04 - 00:37:24:11

Luna

This is dicks. Yes. You just told me about ten blowjobs. We are dicks. We're dicks. Six times three plus one.

00:37:24:13 - 00:37:30:16

Luna

I love that you read it. No. Oh my God. Okay, so.

00:37:30:18 - 00:37:46:15

Jessica

I love penises. I love all shapes and sizes and colors. Oh, yeah. A little red tip. Yeah. Hot curves and.

00:37:46:17 - 00:38:02:11

Luna

All the things. I like the gradient when, like, this part is like, colored. That part the darker color, like I love. I mean, I love all I love when it starts out pale and small and then gets red, and I mean, just all of it. All all formations, all healthy dicks are yummy, I don't know.

00:38:02:13 - 00:38:12:05

Jessica

Yes. So I, I had done like a fair bit of fanfiction reading it up at that point. Like.

00:38:12:20 - 00:38:15:15

Luna

How did I not discover fanfiction? God bless it.

00:38:15:15 - 00:38:31:19

Jessica

Okay, it can be a little raunchy, which is fine. So I had done a bit of reading fanfiction reading and felt like I had a pretty good grasp.

00:38:31:22 - 00:38:44:15

Luna

So bad press. So to get grabbed, pretty good hold up, pretty good handle on it. I got a.

00:38:44:15 - 00:38:46:05

Luna

Taste for what to do. Okay. Sorry.

00:38:46:05 - 00:38:48:23

Luna

I'll let you talk. Oh my God.

00:38:49:01 - 00:38:59:14

Jessica

Yes yes yes, yes and yes. But I felt like I had a pretty good idea of what the basics were, and I. I was tired of it just being book learning.

00:38:59:16 - 00:39:01:05

Luna

You reached your limit.

00:39:01:07 - 00:39:09:13

Jessica

I did, I oh, my God, I was such a horny teenager. Yeah. I'm such a horny adult weed.

00:39:09:13 - 00:39:17:14

Luna

So did you set out to, like, try to get ten or was it. Just let me see what I want to do. Like, do you remember how you were feeling about it at the time?

00:39:17:18 - 00:39:42:23

Jessica

Yeah. So I was not inhibited. I was out of the house. I was feeling good that night. So it was just like, whatever I want to do, I'm going to do. And if I found somebody attractive and he wanted me to blow them, I was going to do it. Yeah. So no, I didn't set out to perform oral sex on ten, guys.

00:39:42:23 - 00:39:45:04

Jessica

But that's what ended up happening.

00:39:45:04 - 00:39:50:05

Luna

You just let the spirit take you? Yes, I love that.

00:39:50:07 - 00:40:15:23

Luna

But I love that you also were keeping track. I mean, not that counting and numbers is the pinnacle of anything, right? You know, people try to base goodness of sex on quantity, like we had sex twice a week, but it's like, well, what is the quality of that? However, as a data gatherer and as someone that just loves numbers and loves to kind of keep track of my lovers, I love, you know, I can usually remember back to who they are.

00:40:15:23 - 00:40:22:08

Luna

I mean, I would take copious journal notes and, have my my private pleasure journal that I read and just masturbate to. Okay.

00:40:22:19 - 00:40:26:00

Luna

You know, but I love that you were paying attention, I love that.

00:40:26:02 - 00:40:29:19

Luna

Were they all in the same bedroom or were they, like, different locations?

00:40:29:21 - 00:40:32:19

Jessica

It was different bedrooms, whatever was free. And.

00:40:32:19 - 00:40:33:18

Luna

Close.

00:40:33:20 - 00:40:38:03

Luna

Was it all private or were there sometimes other people doing things nearby?

00:40:38:05 - 00:40:57:05

Jessica

Okay. So that was that time was private. Okay. The parties, incidentally, were you private experiences? Okay. Also, I only went down on them. They did not get to go down on me.

00:40:57:10 - 00:40:58:01

Luna

Okay.

00:40:58:03 - 00:41:21:10

Jessica

Later. So after I had developed a stronger rapport with there were like three guys that I was good friends with, shall we say. And had been experimenting with a bit all oral and for me, digital penetration, but also like kink stuff.

00:41:21:15 - 00:41:24:22

Luna

How old were you now? And this is not a party environment or where where we.

00:41:25:03 - 00:42:01:02

Jessica

Oh yeah. Sorry. Let me set the scene right. So not a party environment like it was usually at one of their houses when parents were away and I was 15 and 16. So like, in their so in terms of kink stuff, we did breath play bondage. And so dangerous. But we were careful. Blood play. Yeah. Lots of YouTube videos on sterilization.

00:42:01:04 - 00:42:07:22

Luna

Okay. Wait, so these were some of your first experiences I didn't oh yeah. Wow.

00:42:07:22 - 00:42:14:11

Luna

Is this a result of fanfiction or where did these desires enter your head? Or was it because of these partners?

She. So these were some of your first experiences? I didn't. Oh, yeah. Wow. Is this a.

00:43:13:05 - 00:43:19:23

Luna

Result of fan fiction or where did these desires enter your head? Or was it because of these partners?

00:43:19:24 - 00:43:35:03

Jessica

I think I just had, like, a lot of dark things that I was. And to some extent I am into. Blood play is out now. I think I got that out of my system. But yeah. When you scalpels.

00:43:35:03 - 00:43:55:04

Luna

Okay. You what really like designs? What did you do? What did you do? Yeah. Tell us the details of the blood. Let's go there. Let's go there first. Because I have not done this, but I'm. I'm needle curious, right, I like acupuncture. I haven't had it in a while, but I've never had anyone like, do decorative needles. But I've read some needle things that, you know, color me curious with the right person.

00:43:55:06 - 00:43:59:03

Jessica

Yeah. So I didn't actually do needles.

00:43:59:05 - 00:44:00:23

Luna

Just scalpels.

00:44:01:00 - 00:44:05:08

Jessica

Just scalpels and exacto knives.

00:44:05:11 - 00:44:07:07

Luna

Fresh blades, I'm hoping.

00:44:07:09 - 00:44:35:21

Jessica

Yes, but that was the point of it. So we sterilized the blade tips. Anything that would, you know, be pressing into flesh. And exacto knives are pretty easy to switch out, so that was always a good option. Not super expensive for high school students and people. Look you a little funny if you're buying scalpels. They don't really look at you funny if you're buying exacto knives.

00:44:35:23 - 00:44:36:16

Luna

I see, like.

00:44:36:22 - 00:45:26:21

Jessica

Oh, arts and crafts project. Okay, high school kid and it wasn't a lot of decorative patterns, although there were some, but it was mostly on places that I could hide easily. So inner thighs, upper arms and like sides. So like ribs, but mostly, mostly just like straight or wavy lines and nothing too deep. Because it was more about the pain and the sensation of cutting and being cut more than like actually inflicting injury.

00:45:26:23 - 00:45:27:05

Luna

Yeah.

00:45:27:12 - 00:45:41:23

Luna

Was it connected to an erotic experience for you or was it something more in partnership to explore? I heard you say sensory play but like did you guys also have like was it a turn on.

00:45:41:23 - 00:45:45:17

Luna

Basically is what I'm asking. Yeah.

00:45:45:19 - 00:46:30:01

Jessica

So one of my things is vulnerability and my background is as a sub. So I was the one being cut. I was the one in a vulnerable position. But that wouldn't have been something I would do if I didn't trust my partner or partners. So aside from like the physical act of being cut and like feeling life energy flowing out of me, another aspect of the eroticism was trusting somebody with something so dangerous.

00:46:30:06 - 00:46:31:00

Jessica

Yeah.

00:46:31:02 - 00:46:39:16

Luna

Yeah. And I would put risk play up in that same category. Right. We. Yes, I know many people do not conceive of.

00:46:39:18 - 00:46:40:06

Luna

A little bit.

00:46:40:06 - 00:46:43:18

Luna

Of choking as something that is so dangerous, and yet it is, you know, it's.

00:46:43:18 - 00:46:44:14

Jessica

What it is.

00:46:44:16 - 00:46:57:04

Luna

And yet it is. Yeah. So what kinds of conversations were you having that you felt safe with these partners? It sounds like you did some research. We're having some open conversations.

00:46:57:04 - 00:46:58:04

Luna

Maybe this is why you.

00:46:58:04 - 00:46:59:19

Luna

Use red, yellow, green in all.

00:46:59:19 - 00:47:04:18

Luna

Kinds of connections. I don't know, probably. Yes. But what were.

00:47:04:18 - 00:47:06:21

Luna

Those conversations like for you?

00:47:06:23 - 00:47:40:22

Jessica

So, being a little neurotic, I actually wrote up contracts with them, so. Yeah. Little high school just writing up sex contracts. But it very clearly laid out like this is the limit of each activity. If you exceed this, all future endeavors are terminated. Legal action, yada yada, yada. So sexy.

00:47:40:24 - 00:47:41:18

Luna

I mean, it is though.

00:47:41:18 - 00:47:54:11

Luna

Safety is sexy and clarity is sexy. It creates that clear, hard container for where I am going to play, you know, especially if you're playing with something that's so edgy.

00:47:54:12 - 00:48:33:02

Jessica

Yeah. And then I guess that brings me to an unpleasant aspect. One of my partners in the heat of the moment, breached my boundaries and forced his cock down my throat, and it was a horrible experience, but also something that I learned from. And all ties were severed. And I also, very clear with my partners now with what's acceptable and what's not.

00:48:33:04 - 00:48:44:01

Jessica

And if boundaries are trod on or pushed, you get one warning and that's it.

00:48:44:03 - 00:48:53:17

Luna

Wow, I am so sorry that happened. That fucking sucks because what a way to ruin the energy of dicks, dicks, dicks. You know what I mean? Like like all it has to.

00:48:53:17 - 00:48:55:01

Luna

Be is so.

00:48:55:03 - 00:49:16:24

Luna

Good and collaborative. You don't have to fuck it up. Damn. Yeah, I, I too will often give a warning if it seems in good faith. I also have ended connections. When immediately it was clear to me energetically or whatever that it was like, you know, one lecherous whatever, I've been like that. Then we're done doing that. Get out now.

00:49:16:24 - 00:49:17:12

Luna

Thank you.

00:49:17:12 - 00:49:19:01

Luna

Okay. You know. Yeah.

00:49:19:03 - 00:49:38:13

Luna

But I also, in general, I have filtered people to the point of maybe there was a miscommunication. I'll give them one chance, and then I'm like, you're dunzo. Did you were you able to receive external support in that healing? Like, how did you kind of process that breach?

00:49:38:15 - 00:49:54:04

Jessica

So I think in some ways I was fortunate because I, I was able to take control of the situation again. And he ended up in the hospital, not me.

00:49:54:06 - 00:49:58:11

Luna

For you. That's I like just.

00:49:58:11 - 00:50:10:24

Luna

Wish there was some karmic thing where, like anyone who abuses another human being, like their genitals are instantly just like staple like like if there could be like a cosmic creature that immediately.

00:50:11:01 - 00:50:11:19

Luna

Like.

00:50:11:21 - 00:50:12:19

Luna

You know, like, I don't.

00:50:12:19 - 00:50:23:06

Luna

Know, like a monster, like this is like what my brain fantasizes about. Like just the jaws of the spirit from the beyond. It's like, whatever. Just chomp. No. When people wouldn't fuck with each other, you know?

00:50:23:06 - 00:50:43:12

Luna

And my favorite, my favorite book, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress. If a man so much as touches a woman, they live on the moon and there's a ratio of 10 to 1, male to female. And so if anyone touches a woman in a way that she did not consent to, all the other dudes, just round them up and put them into space immediately, like, that's the kind of consent law that I'm like that that.

00:50:43:12 - 00:50:55:18

Luna

So, I'm not promoting violence. I am, in fact promoting the opposite. And I love that you took care of yourself in the way that was available to now.

00:50:55:20 - 00:51:29:23

Jessica

So yes, in some ways I was able to I think I was I was fortunate and able to reclaim agency and it took a very long time, like more than a decade, a long time before I talked to a therapist about it and processed it with a professional, but I had processed it with partners before that. So that was that was good.

00:51:30:00 - 00:51:30:18

Jessica

Yeah.

00:51:30:20 - 00:51:32:04

Luna

Yeah.

00:51:32:06 - 00:51:44:06

Luna

When did you have penetrative partnered sex and like, did you always identify as a sex fiend? I am identifying you as a sex fiend just based on a little that I know of you. I feel like we have the same common, but, like, when.

00:51:44:06 - 00:51:48:01

Luna

Did you, like, know you were a sexy and when did you.

00:51:48:03 - 00:51:50:12

Luna

You know, start really fucking.

00:51:50:14 - 00:51:55:20

Jessica

Okay, so I didn't pop my cherry until I was 19.

00:51:55:22 - 00:51:58:08

Luna

I'd be two twins. Really? Yeah.

00:51:58:11 - 00:52:01:04

Luna

Like 12, 19.5. Not for lack of trying.

00:52:01:05 - 00:52:18:15

Jessica

So I was with a serious partner, and that's how I lost my virginity. It wasn't to a certain extent, I guess it was planned, but it wasn't like today we are going to have sex. Yeah, I really want this, like, right now. So fucking put it in me.

00:52:18:17 - 00:52:20:02

Luna

00:52:20:04 - 00:52:25:03

Luna

Were you already serious at the time, or did it become serious after it got put in?

00:52:25:05 - 00:53:02:04

Jessica

It was getting serious before, so we had been together like maybe a month. Okay. He hadn't really ever explored Bdsm, but I knew he was a doll. And I was like, well, I do actually have some experience in this field. Do you want to explore it together? So we had done some spanking and some oral, just like fun touches.

00:53:02:04 - 00:53:22:08

Jessica

Come play. I love Come Play. I really do. And I was and am very attracted to him. And so, so horny. That day I was so horny.

00:53:22:11 - 00:53:24:18

Luna

I love that.

00:53:24:20 - 00:53:53:15

Jessica

And we had been, like, playing around for probably six hours, and I was like, I need to feel you inside me. So he put on a condom and I was like, this is what I've been missing. I this is it. Oh, wow. So good. I know a lot of people have shitty first times, but, like, the man knows what he's doing.

00:53:53:16 - 00:53:54:05

Jessica

00:53:54:07 - 00:54:02:21

Luna

I too had a woo hoo like, I was like, finally, you know, like, I was just so excited. What was good about it for you? What do you remember? Like, it sounds like you were.

00:54:02:21 - 00:54:07:24

Luna

Warmed up for six hours. Like, what does that step one. Amazing. I wasn't.

00:54:07:24 - 00:54:12:19

Luna

But like, I mean, I was warmed up all the years and all the years of trying and getting rejected, but like.

00:54:12:21 - 00:54:16:09

Luna

Oh, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay. I it's.

00:54:16:09 - 00:54:24:24

Luna

Divine timing. And also, I now know that some boys are scared of women who want to have sex. And I had to learn.

00:54:25:01 - 00:54:29:22

Luna

Throw asking for times and getting rejected by different people. If.

00:54:29:22 - 00:54:35:17

Jessica

I can get. I guess if you had asked me, I would have been like, oh, Luna.

00:54:35:18 - 00:54:37:05

Luna

Oh, thank you. I mean.

00:54:37:05 - 00:54:53:12

Luna

I just yeah. See, goes to show, I had to learn some things about asking the right people, but you asked someone who was a great fit, someone that was arousing you deeply for hours and weeks. So tell us about the wonderful part. What do you remember?

00:54:53:14 - 00:55:29:23

Jessica

So I have a fairly tight pussy. Yes, I have been told I'm also like extremely wet. Like there's just like a lot of fluid. So I remember him pushing into me. He has a sizable dick, it's thick and it's long, so I remember feeling the head even though the condom was there, like compressing things. I could feel like his head.

00:55:29:23 - 00:55:35:24

Jessica

And when it went in on that ridge. Am I getting aroused, right? No.

00:55:35:24 - 00:55:41:17

Luna

Absolutely. Yeah. I'm like, oh, it's really tight now.

00:55:41:17 - 00:55:43:18

Luna

Okay, well now I want to be in a threesome.

00:55:43:18 - 00:55:53:16

Luna

Like now we're going to I just want to I mean, you know, just for scientific purposes, an exploration. Okay. You know, just curious. I mean.

00:55:53:18 - 00:55:55:13

Jessica

Absolutely. Yeah. Yes.

00:55:55:13 - 00:55:58:01

Luna

You in the beautiful, beautiful. Add it to the bucket list.

00:55:58:03 - 00:56:10:04

Jessica

So yes, I remember his head going in and like, stretching me. And I don't know if that's like a thing that you enjoy, but.

00:56:10:05 - 00:56:13:01

Luna

Oh yeah, for me I'm like.

00:56:13:03 - 00:56:29:12

Luna

I love being stretched filled. I should love just feeling like it's not just about being filled up. And it can be different sizes, different thicknesses. But I love feeling my body react to another body. It's so. Yes, yummy.

00:56:29:14 - 00:56:41:01

Jessica

And then he, like, paused for a moment and then slid in. This. I was really six hours. Yeah, it was really. Well, that's a lot of buildup.

00:56:41:03 - 00:56:53:21

Luna

Yeah. How how to get a woman to beg for it. I'm being I'm being gender general here. But like, how do you get a person to beg for it? Spend six hours warming them up with lots of teasing and at me. Okay.

00:56:53:21 - 00:56:57:12

Luna

Yeah, yeah. It'll work. Right.

00:56:57:14 - 00:57:10:15

Jessica

And I remember he, like, hit my back. Whoa. And I just came, so hard, like.

00:57:10:17 - 00:57:28:21

Luna

Yeah. Wow. Okay, so this seems like a good time to talk about your orgasms. Not that they are the end all. Be all. Not that they are the goal, not their priority, but they sure are nice. I mean, for some people, they are the priority. You can tell us if that's you, but it sounds like you can come from internal stimulation when.

00:57:28:21 - 00:57:31:00

Luna

Warmed up properly.

00:57:31:02 - 00:57:42:07

Jessica

Yes, absolutely. I don't have loads of data. Would be nice if I had hundreds of women that I could compare to, but presently not the case in.

00:57:42:07 - 00:57:43:12

Luna

Progress.

00:57:43:14 - 00:58:11:09

Jessica

In progress. I have been told that I am very orgasmic, so I really like clitoris stimulation. That is often a very a quick way to get me to come. Okay. Internal. So especially G-spot will get quite a response. I tend to squeeze down pretty hard. Not trying to. It just happens.

00:58:11:15 - 00:58:13:01

Luna

It's tight with.

00:58:13:03 - 00:58:26:18

Jessica

Tight and wet. And I can often come from Naxos, so it's kept me off really easily.

00:58:26:20 - 00:58:27:19

Luna

Orgasmic neck.

00:58:27:21 - 00:58:38:16

Luna

Kisses. What is is it really? Yeah. I'm gleaning this. I didn't know these things. I'm like, oh, treasure trove. The what? How?

00:58:38:16 - 00:58:43:19

Luna

Like sucking, nibbling. What about your lobes? Like what parts of your neck?

00:58:43:21 - 00:59:15:07

Jessica

So basically, basically anywhere on my neck, collarbone. My ears are really sensitive in my intro, you mentioned, CPU of sexuality, and oralism, but it can also be text. If someone is able to stimulate my brain, I can. I can come from reading or hearing.

00:59:15:09 - 00:59:16:23

Luna

Like dirty talk.

00:59:17:00 - 00:59:18:15

Jessica

Yeah.

00:59:18:17 - 00:59:23:07

Luna

So you can come from talking or reading. Is it dirty talk in particular or.

00:59:23:07 - 00:59:24:13

Luna

Is it any.

00:59:24:15 - 00:59:28:24

Luna

Type of turn up? Like are there other things like CPU, sexuality?

00:59:28:24 - 00:59:32:14

Luna

You could be broad, but is it specifically like intelligent.

00:59:32:16 - 00:59:33:21

Luna

Personalized, dirty talk?

00:59:33:21 - 00:59:37:15

Luna

Like what words have made you come?

00:59:37:17 - 00:59:59:08

Jessica

I am not sure that I can recall the specific words, but I have a very, very vivid imagination. And I think that if there is enough explicit detail, my brain kind of fills it in with sensation.

00:59:59:11 - 01:00:03:03

Luna

I was going to say, yeah, it sounds like your sensory okay sensation and imagination.

01:00:03:07 - 01:00:09:04

Luna

Wow wow wow. A little odd.

01:00:09:06 - 01:00:21:13

Luna

A wonderful kind of odd. So I take it that you are a multiple orgasm or, like I, I oftentimes if I have one, especially if it's like an intense one, then I'm done.

01:00:21:18 - 01:00:22:20

Jessica

Really?

01:00:22:22 - 01:00:45:00

Luna

Yes. And I feel like I maybe have also run into you when I'm, like, overstimulated from coming because I. And so that's why I really like edging because also for me, if I, I mean whatever, I've had a day or two in my life where I've had like 10 or 12, but that's like super maximum, like it's almost uncomfortable, like because at some point I may have to stop because everything will.

01:00:45:00 - 01:00:45:13

Jessica

Get too.

01:00:45:13 - 01:01:10:03

Luna

Much, too loud, too sensitive, too like, can't have music, can't have light. Sometimes it touches like that's when I need to get flogged to kind of like get reset. Because the impact helps me balance out. And so sometimes having the intensity of sensation is what allows me to keep going pleasure wise. You know, and I also have had like, rolling pleasure, but that's also where it's like different types of orgasms do different things to me, you know.

01:01:10:03 - 01:01:29:00

Luna

And so I can definitely have like lighter comes or like internal intense internal, like full body things. So tell us about your version of like how you experience each one. Like can you just keep going? Like if someone's, like, nibbling your neck and touching your clit and then they fuck you inside, like, will you come multiple ways?

01:01:29:02 - 01:01:42:02

Luna

Yes. Cool. Wow. I love that. And like, I want to watch you in divine timing. And I don't think.

01:01:42:04 - 01:01:45:15

Jessica

I actually I didn't realize that was abnormal.

01:01:45:17 - 01:01:46:19

Luna

Everyone's different.

01:01:46:19 - 01:01:48:05

Luna

Everyone's different, everyone's different.

01:01:48:06 - 01:02:06:09

Luna

I don't meet as many people that are like me. You know, I meet a lot of people that can come kind of a lot when I meet a lot of people that are, like satisfied after 1 or 2. And I'm talking about pussy owners here, I'm sure everyone's different. But yeah, I mean, and then again, I've also interviewed someone on this podcast who can come in the wind.

01:02:06:12 - 01:02:10:19

Luna

And I'm like, whoa, you know, like it's not her like normal everyday thing, but.

01:02:10:20 - 01:02:18:17

Luna

Like it's happened and I'm like, wow, you know? And I've heard the what about your nipples? Are your nipples orgasmic? Do you have that through line?

01:02:18:19 - 01:02:25:13

Jessica

So I like when someone plays with my nipples, but I've never come from it.

01:02:25:19 - 01:02:26:16

Luna

Okay. Not yet.

01:02:26:21 - 01:02:27:24

Jessica

A challenge. Maybe.

01:02:28:01 - 01:02:29:24

Luna

I never have an exploration.

01:02:29:24 - 01:02:31:09

Luna

Certainly.

01:02:31:11 - 01:02:36:12

Luna

But do you enjoy nipple worship? Receiving it? Yes, okay, I do.

01:02:36:18 - 01:02:37:08

Luna

Yeah.

01:02:37:09 - 01:02:38:00

Jessica

That's fun.

01:02:38:04 - 01:02:42:13

Luna

Yeah. What other parts of your body love to be touched and worshiped? And how.

01:02:42:15 - 01:03:15:07

Jessica

So? I like, as we have established a little bit earlier, I was into some like heavier Bdsm. I mean, I wouldn't say like heavy, but like heavier Bdsm. I'm definitely lighter now, but I, I enjoy spanking, I like impact play. I also love the feel of restraints. Something that I want to explore is, shibori. It's so beautiful.

01:03:15:07 - 01:03:18:08

Luna

It's it's a yummy type of restraint to.

01:03:18:11 - 01:04:01:06

Jessica

Really is but my skin in general is just extremely, extremely sensitive. A little bit of kiss curse, but light, light touches almost anywhere on my body will give me the shivers. I'm like, shivering right now. And I really adore kissing. Like just a full open mouth to mouth intense, passionate kiss is mind blowing.

01:04:01:08 - 01:04:02:17

Luna

Yeah.

01:04:02:19 - 01:04:12:23

Luna

With and without fucking. I love both ways. But yeah, it's so. Also, I do feel like I am just in this new. It's like being a teen in my 30s. Like I'm like, oh.

01:04:13:00 - 01:04:15:15

Luna

Kissing is so hot, you know?

01:04:15:15 - 01:04:36:11

Luna

But also, the more that I say that, the more I other people are like, yes, kissing, kissing, kissing. You know, it's like, oh yeah. And I don't know if that's like a post-Covid thing or if it's a sex work related thing, but it's just like it just seems extra special. Do you have sensitive feet? Do your feet enjoy worship, or are they typically or have you explored them enough?

01:04:36:12 - 01:05:23:17

Jessica

They are typically I haven't done a whole lot of foot worship exploration yet, something that I'm yet and something that I'm open to. But yeah, I, I guess I don't know enough. Yeah. I do enjoy when people play with my hair. It feels really good sometimes the like rough tugs, but also like, if we're cuddling just like, getting my scalp massaged a little bit, or just, like, playing, just like little playing with my hair, like, it's just very, very nice and will probably get me into another round.

01:05:23:19 - 01:05:25:02

Jessica

Yeah.

01:05:25:04 - 01:05:39:13

Luna

Oh, that's so yummy. When in your intimate journey, did you begin to identify as consensually non-monogamous or ethically non-monogamous? They are interchangeable, as I understand it.

01:05:39:15 - 01:06:08:16

Jessica

I want to say in in high school, when I was, seeing those three guys like one of them had a girlfriend and she was into it. Sometimes we would play a little bit, but mostly it was with those three. But everything was very, like open and playful and fun until it wasn't, my journey is not really linear.

01:06:08:18 - 01:06:27:12

Jessica

I also found that I was into exhibitionism at that time, so some of the most fun that I had was one of the guys had this, like, I don't know, I don't even know why he had it. He had this, like really large, round bed.

01:06:27:17 - 01:06:30:21

Luna

I one.

01:06:30:23 - 01:06:49:02

Jessica

And we would pull it away from the wall and put chairs around it. And there were friends and friends of friends who would come over and watch me get myself off.

01:06:49:04 - 01:06:49:24

Luna

Oh my God.

01:06:49:24 - 01:06:56:06

Luna

Okay, you don't even know all the fantasies that I've had about circle related things.

01:06:56:06 - 01:07:03:14

Luna

As you can see, I love the representations of the moon. But, Wow.

01:07:03:14 - 01:07:10:12

Luna

Wait, what? So you would just just get yourself off with watchers?

01:07:10:14 - 01:07:12:11

Luna

How many.

01:07:12:13 - 01:07:47:19

Jessica

Do I want to say? If it was like a full, full audience? Like 12. Sometimes it was single guys, and then other times it would be like girls and their boyfriends. And I would usually do some, like manual masturbation, and I would use a variety of toys. And then occasionally I would have one of my partners play with me.

01:07:47:21 - 01:07:51:04

Jessica

Yeah. It was really hot.

01:07:51:06 - 01:07:52:19

Luna

It was so much fun.

01:07:52:22 - 01:08:04:12

Luna

Was that something that you were, like an instant? Yes, too. Or did you have to think about it? Like what? Because I'm trying to imagine a younger me and I don't know, like I was open. But what.

01:08:04:14 - 01:08:05:01

Luna

Drew.

01:08:05:01 - 01:08:09:12

Luna

You toward this experience? Like, do you remember your thought and or feeling process?

01:08:09:14 - 01:08:47:00

Jessica

Well, I want to say that the first time I did anything kind of like that, it was my three guys wanted to just sit and watch. One of them, who was a weird data nerd like me. And I think, like you a little bit, wanted to count how many times I came. So he set a timer for half an hour, and I think it was something like 24 times.

01:08:47:02 - 01:08:50:05

Luna

Wow. I would.

01:08:50:07 - 01:08:54:11

Luna

Be dead. Like, not even the fun. But that is amazing. I'm like.

01:08:54:11 - 01:08:58:06

Luna

I'd be a watcher. Oh my gosh. Whoa!

01:08:58:08 - 01:09:02:02

Luna

Was it hands? Was it toys? Was it a mixture? What do you remember?

01:09:02:04 - 01:09:29:04

Jessica

It was Hans. And I think it was a it was a black lilo. Okay. I don't I don't remember like, what exactly? It was some kind of penetrative toy. And I just went at it.

01:09:29:06 - 01:09:34:23

Luna

Wow. More than once. It sounds like you like it was a repeat. Like. Wow.

01:09:35:00 - 01:09:50:00

Jessica

So that was the first time. And I was like, oh, that was fun. And like, I liked this is a little bit of a power dynamic thing. I think I enjoyed how much they liked it. Yeah. If that makes sense.

01:09:50:01 - 01:10:15:06

Luna

Oh, that makes total sense. I, I'm always happy to be watched or not watched. Like if the context is correct, I'm not shy about like you are watching. I will only get off on it if there is a specific person who wants to watch me be watched like it is, that it is in fact that dynamic. I'm like yes, just tell me to go do whatever you want me to do and it'll take it to the next level for me.

01:10:15:08 - 01:10:31:09

Luna

It's already hot to me. If it's just like, oh yes, this is a place of permission, I can be free. I can do what I want, you know, if people want to watch, I love to serve them that way. But if it's like if someone whispers naughty things into my ear and then I have to go out on stage and do a thing which has not happened except in my fantasies, you know, I'm like.

01:10:31:12 - 01:10:32:24

Jessica

Oh yes, you.

01:10:32:24 - 01:10:52:22

Luna

Know it. Like you said, it's that connection. It's the exchange. It's the relationship that is connected, that takes the erotic to the next level for me. And that's why casual sex, like pure, straight up casual, like, I mean casual like Tinder fucking where people are basically like sex dolls to each other and they don't really talk and they kind of don't even whatever.

01:10:52:24 - 01:11:04:17

Luna

So uninteresting to me. And I'm hearing that increasingly from other people. So I don't think I'm really unique here, or with the rise in the number of people that are describing themselves to me as demi sexual, I'm like, yes, I.

01:11:04:17 - 01:11:12:18

Luna

Too am a human that enjoys connection. I feel, you know, it's like, yes, it is hotter when it's personalized. I agree with, you know, like, yes, I do.

01:11:12:18 - 01:11:15:02

Luna

Want to get to know someone, you know, even I don't have to know them.

01:11:15:02 - 01:11:16:03

Luna

For years.

01:11:16:03 - 01:11:28:23

Luna

I could know them for ten, 20 or 30 minutes. But I need to feel connection in our exchange so that I can have a next level experience, not just an orgasm, because I can just, yeah, do that.

01:11:29:00 - 01:11:30:06

Jessica

I can do that on my own.

01:11:30:08 - 01:11:31:04

Luna

I can do that on my own.

01:11:31:08 - 01:11:34:09

Luna

Yeah, yeah. Wow.

01:11:34:12 - 01:11:42:21

Luna

When did you. It sounds like also pretty young. You were identifying as not straight. Like, when did you identify your sexuality?

01:11:42:23 - 01:11:58:12

Jessica

So I think I would have identified myself as like, queer curious in high school, but also not like, labeled anything. In fact, I didn't label anything.

01:11:58:12 - 01:12:00:14

Luna

That's vaguely curious.

01:12:00:16 - 01:12:37:13

Jessica

Yes. Oh, yes. That, like, people of all genders are sexy, but not like actively pursuing anything. Because dicks, dicks, dicks, But I tend to find as person in 2018, it was just like, when I just like, sat and reflected for a little while, I realized I am not straight. I am not straight. Even a little bit.