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49 straight dude, president of BSG PR, into: work, music, travel

🔗 BRIAN LINKS | @bsgpr / X

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00:00:00:03 - 00:00:25:00

Luna

Our guest today is a 49 year old straight dude who is into travel, sports, music and women. And like me, he is into work in media and public relations, and his clients have also included some of the largest businesses, celebrities and music acts in the world, including some very sexy ones. With us today, president of BSG PR welcome, Brian Scott Gross.

00:00:25:02 - 00:00:26:15

Brian

I like the wave.

00:00:26:17 - 00:00:29:23

Luna

Thanks for playing, Chris. Thanks for being here. How are you doing today?

00:00:30:00 - 00:00:32:19

Brian

Thanks for having me. I'm wonderful. How are you?

00:00:33:00 - 00:00:41:11

Luna

I am super wonderful. I am woo hoo! Excited that you are here. Could you start off by telling us how do you woo yourself?

00:00:41:13 - 00:01:02:19

Brian

So I'm an active person. So literally I just got out of my 6:00 yoga sculpt class, which I take every night. And so for me, it's all about activity. I walk, I get into my office, I walk every morning, and then I go to yoga, sculpt. And before the pandemic, I was playing all the sports I played my whole life.

00:01:02:21 - 00:01:26:01

Brian

And that just sort of shifted. I've run for marathons, a ton of half marathon. I've done some of those crazy Spartan races. For me, it's an activity that's active. It's keeping my mind going because like you being someone who loves their work and for lack of a better term, addicted to it, we need I need physical activity.

00:01:26:03 - 00:01:29:11

Brian

So I would consider that my role in that regard.

00:01:29:16 - 00:01:40:09

Luna

Oh, I love that. Okay. Piggybacking off that question, how would you say your work helps people love and or who themselves?

00:01:40:11 - 00:02:15:11

Brian

You know, my work, when I had the opportunity to get into the adult industry and be a publicist for Vivid Entertainment, which at the time was the largest adult entertainment company in the world, it was all about communication. It was all about, you know, adult film. In the late 90s, early two, thousands were still so taboo. And I had this opportunity to take what I did for six years in the music industry and put it towards the biggest adult film stars and the biggest company.

00:02:15:11 - 00:02:42:21

Brian

And this person, Steven Hirsch, who created this brand and this company and just builds and builds and builds and I got to be a part of it. So I think the biggest part of growing is communication, if not the biggest part, whatever. However, it is physical, verbal touch. It's all forms, right? Yeah. So that's where it just came to me, where it was like, you know, I was fairly young at the time where I was like, let's go, let's do this.

00:02:42:23 - 00:02:49:18

Brian

So I don't know if it's a perfect answer in this regard, but to me it always comes down to communication.

00:02:49:19 - 00:02:54:03

Luna

Yeah, absolutely. Well, there are no perfect answers here. And we're just noodling on all things and kind of talking.

00:02:54:03 - 00:02:55:00

Brian

I love it.

00:02:55:02 - 00:03:13:20

Luna

Let's do it. So I am curious though, because for me, communication is a huge part of my own personal connection with other people in all forms. With my my little obsession. But I'm curious, what does it take for someone else to woo you? Like, how would another person romance you?

00:03:13:22 - 00:03:36:04

Brian

You know, it's it's. I'll never forget. I used to do musicals when I was in high school, and I did a summer musical one year, and this really, really cute girl kept punching me in the arm. Just. She just kept hitting me in the arm, and I was like, why is this girl hitting me? And. And I didn't think anything of it.

00:03:36:04 - 00:04:10:18

Brian

And my, my naivete and youth and whatnot. And so a while later, they were like, so-and-so really likes you. I'm like, why does she hit me? And I was just her way. And that was one of my first memories of sort of the opposite wooing aspect. It's certainly has been aggressive in my life because I have, for lack of a better term, falling into relationships over my lifetime where I'd meet someone, we'd connect and just go with the flow and go for it.

00:04:10:20 - 00:04:32:18

Brian

So the wooing on the on the opposite sex and has been, however it may be. But I've always tried my best not to force anything or to try and make it. I love we're doing this, you know. It was all honestly, sometimes the opposite where the person would be like, are we doing this? And I'd be like, let's go, let's see where this goes.

00:04:32:20 - 00:04:39:06

Brian

And so there's been a lot of journeys since my late teens in that regard.

00:04:39:07 - 00:05:03:08

Luna

I love that you have work where you support creatives of many artists, of many type in their work. To me, that's romantic. I'm learning that work is kind of my love language along with food. If I can eat food while working, I'm happiest girl in the whole wide world. But, how do you think your work helps other people woo each other?

00:05:03:09 - 00:05:16:02

Luna

You know, I could see this from the client to audience perspective, but also, like, audiences together. Like, how do you think about that at all? Like how your work creates romance between other people in the world? I'm all about ripples of love on this planet.

00:05:16:02 - 00:05:36:09

Brian

I wish I did. I mean, I don't because I'm so in the trenches. I'm so forth for the trees and I'm like daily grind like noise and putting your head down. And it's the hustle and that endless hustle and I think romance. I think you brought up a great point. Romanticizing your work is important because people want this on a work life balance.

00:05:36:09 - 00:06:10:08

Brian

But what if what if we love what we do? Like, what if we're, you know, enthralled? What if I come into my office on Christmas Day and get some work done, like if it makes me happy, isn't that my right? So the thought that I'm the consumer, the other end of whomever client it. Let's take Maitland Ward, who's a client of mine, and she's a phenomenal human being, and she creates these incredible adult scenes and film for the Vixen Media Group and the people on the other end that are enjoying it together, solo, what have you.

00:06:10:08 - 00:06:30:13

Brian

If they're if they're enjoying it and she enjoys making it and I enjoy promoting it, then we all went away. I mean, that's the ultimate end game in that regard is when the final product, whatever it may be, is enjoyable and personal to those who are receiving it.

00:06:30:15 - 00:06:51:16

Luna

Yeah, yeah, I we are very sex work friendly here. I have many friends who work in different aspects of the industry. What do you say when people say things to you? Like for example, one of my friends who works at one of the legal brothels had a client who was young. He was there to have his first experience with her, you know?

00:06:51:16 - 00:07:12:21

Luna

And then partway through their connection, he asked if he could step into the other room to watch some porn on his phone so they can get harder so that they could actually, like, do the deed. When people like bring that your way, what do you say to them? Like how do you kind of like handle that? Because, you know, porn is such a big topic and it's not one thing.

00:07:12:23 - 00:07:48:14

Brian

You know, that's something that I didn't see coming, no pun intended. I didn't see, you know, I'm Jenna. We remember our very first memories of being in the Albertson's, and someone grabs the adult magazine. It shows you a pair of chips. Yeah, you never forget that. It is there. You never forget the scrambled Playboy Channel. You never forget Midnight Blue from Australia on Playboy.

00:07:48:14 - 00:08:18:11

Brian

If your parents had had it and you sneak down and watch it, right? But it was in accessible, you had to go get it. I never saw a world where it was so in your face and there's positive, the negative. And certainly I think some of the challenges right now are exactly that. Person X thinks pornography is real or need to build up something to then get to the reality.

00:08:18:12 - 00:08:43:10

Brian

I guess I'm selfish in the manner of I've never had that issue in the aspect of the real thing will always be my favorite. It was always the personal touch, the little from the little it to the wild. So for a young man, I mean, these are the challenges, you know, and so certainly do not have the answer to that.

00:08:43:10 - 00:09:14:18

Brian

And I think things are going to continue in a certain path. But ultimately one of the our biggest challenges is in this country alone, where we look down upon sexuality. We and, you know, we have crazy abortion laws coming to coming to shape and where you have powers that be that want to manipulate and control one's sexuality. And ironically, those are the states where pornography is viewed the most.

00:09:14:21 - 00:09:43:10

Brian

Yeah. And sex toys are sold the most. So we're very, backwards. And it's disappointing. And again, I just go back to my core of communicate, talk about it, you know, but we're going to have challenges with young adults. And certainly there's this incel aspect. It's going to come down to, you know, sitting people down, but making people feel comfortable.

00:09:43:12 - 00:10:03:02

Brian

When people find out what I do for a living, who I've worked with and so on, which I have now for over 25 years, it opens doors. People feel more relaxed. Now. I get the opposite too. I get the dirty looks as well. In my life. That's certainly gotten the negative, but the positive just so and so.

00:10:03:02 - 00:10:26:17

Brian

Sitting there next to me, man or woman and have and tell me a story because all of a sudden, because of what I do for a living and mind you, I'm a published it. Okay? I'm not a performer. Yeah. I'm not a gigolo, but because I'm around it, because I work so closely with those involved, there's a comfortability factor.

00:10:26:18 - 00:10:30:14

Brian

Wouldn't it be nice if you could just have that with anyone?

00:10:30:16 - 00:10:45:16

Luna

While I'm lucky, I do, I hope so. Do I want it for more people? Because, I mean, I, like you receive stories from people left, right? Were you always that comfortable or was it something that you developed through your work?

00:10:45:18 - 00:11:13:06

Brian

I think I always was. I mean, I was a late bloomer. I didn't lose my virginity at 20. And I know and I remember my very first ejaculation, and it was rubbing against a bed, for Christ sakes. So, you know, my introduction was, you know, it's the classic stories, you know, so in that regard, for whatever reason, as soon as puberty hit and I liked girls, it was it was fairly comfortable.

00:11:13:06 - 00:11:32:12

Brian

But, you know, it was so different, you know, it was such a different time. So, I mean, you had your different challenges and what was going on in your body and people around you and so on and so forth. But I was always outgoing. I was a choir boy. I had a music scholarship. I was part of Junior Statesmen.

00:11:32:13 - 00:11:50:08

Brian

So, so speaking in public, doing things like this, talking to people, never a problem. You know, it's never shy in that regard. That when I discovered my career at 17, funny enough, it was like, oh, this is a no brainer. I'm going to talk to people and promote shit for the rest of my life. I'm in.

00:11:50:10 - 00:12:06:23

Brian

Come in. So I think it just went from loving music to loving, promoting adult content and it went off from there. So and everything in between, frankly, so very comfortable in that regard.

00:12:07:01 - 00:12:16:16

Luna

I love that. Okay. Oh, I have too many follow up questions. But actually can we circle back to the bed. Was it like on the mattress or was it like the frame of the oh my gosh.

00:12:16:18 - 00:12:39:18

Brian

It was my bed in my in my bedroom at the house I grew up in. And her name was Samantha. And and the funny thing about Samantha, she was an ice skater, right? So she had these massive thighs, right? Because she was strong. And I thought I was rubbing against her as we were. It was dry humping for what it's worth.

00:12:39:20 - 00:12:51:12

Brian

And then it happened and I looked down. I was rubbing that against the side of my bed the whole time. I was so lost. Right. I'm making out.

00:12:51:13 - 00:12:53:09

Luna

We don't know. What do we know?

00:12:53:11 - 00:13:10:21

Brian

I was like, and then it happened and you're like, wait, I feel different. You know, you just watch it happen. So it was pure accident of me thinking I was rubbing against her leg, which of course sounds gross as well. Or immature. What?

00:13:10:22 - 00:13:14:16

Luna

I think dry humping is a terrible name, and it's one of my favorite things in the whole wide world.

00:13:14:22 - 00:13:31:22

Brian

It it's fun. Yes, it is so much fun, I agree, I'm glad we agree, but it was an ass off like it happened. I look down and you know, and the whole time I was rubbing against the bed. Not not her. The bed.

00:13:32:00 - 00:13:37:20

Luna

That's very funny. That was your very first ejaculation. So you didn't even discover touching yourself yet at that point?

00:13:37:20 - 00:14:05:15

Brian

No. I was so late to masturbation. It's hysterical. And and I'm so grateful that I was so late to that game. Literally discovered it the summer going into college. How about that? Didn't masturbate in high school, and I just. I thank God every day. Good lord knows a sexual exam or what it would be like. It might started like, I don't know, seventh, eighth grade.

00:14:05:15 - 00:14:18:11

Brian

Like, yes, I had erections. I had no idea what to do with them and I didn't try, thank the Lord. And so it was just again, late, late, late, late to the game, but very grateful in that regard.

00:14:18:12 - 00:14:47:17

Luna

So interesting. Okay. I happen to know that you work with one of my favorite companies. Educated who? Past guest. We have an affiliate link description below if you guys are curious, you know, to to kind of circle back to what you were talking about communication. I talked to so many people who don't know how to communicate. What have you learned about sexual communication through your work and or through any educational clients that you've had, like sex, educational.

00:14:47:18 - 00:15:11:09

Brian

Well, and educators. An incredible client I've worked with for almost a year, and I've just enjoyed working with them so much, actually over a year. Because such wonderful people are so open minded and so up for the challenge of trying to build a brand in a world that, you know, they get their pushback. So, I mean, I'm really proud to work with them.

00:15:11:11 - 00:15:32:09

Brian

You know, the word I will always go to is fearless because in order to get your message across, and in this day and age when we're just inundated with so much messaging, you have to be fearless. And when you're dealing with sex sexuality in anything other, you have to be fearless. You have to not be afraid of offending.

00:15:32:11 - 00:15:54:18

Brian

You have to not be afraid of pushing the envelope. You have to not be afraid. And in order to accomplish what your goals are, you can't be tepid. You can't be. I'm going to use the word snowflake. Sorry for those offended, but you can't be a snowflake. You have to be strong. You have to be determined. And that's how you get your point across.

00:15:54:22 - 00:16:00:02

Luna

Wait, sorry. What does the snowflake mean here? You melt easily or you look different and then you melt well.

00:16:00:07 - 00:16:21:19

Brian

Well, in the common term, a snowflake is someone who gets offended easily. Oh, and so if I'm speaking or if I'm promoting something with the fear of offending you, I'm not going to accomplish what my clients want me to accomplish. So when I offend you, upset you, piss you off so and so. Hey, my skin is thick. I can handle that.

00:16:21:20 - 00:16:43:02

Brian

That's part of the deal for my profession and what I've chosen. But you have to be fearless, knowing that you might offend someone. And I have offended plenty, plenty of people over decades. And I'm still here, and I'm still grinding. So less grinding on my bet, fortunately, but more grinding in the work and more just pushing the envelope.

00:16:43:02 - 00:16:47:17

Brian

And that's where that company of educated is really doing some incredible work.

00:16:47:19 - 00:17:07:14

Luna

It's so interesting because I started this podcast wanting to create a space where people could talk about sex more, because I noticed during the media explosion that people really didn't know they were not very comfortable talking about sex. And I'm a person who has grown up not being very afraid of stuff my whole life, and people like you should be afraid.

00:17:07:14 - 00:17:23:00

Luna

You should be afraid. I'm like, oh, okay, well, I'll get afraid when I'm scared. However, I have run into like some severe censorship issues, like stumbled just headfirst. How have you experienced censorship, if at all, especially over the past? You've been here decades and a half.

00:17:23:02 - 00:17:45:10

Brian

Daily battle. It's a daily battle for my clients. It's a daily battle. And it will always it will always be a battle. It'll be a battle in America, and it'll be a battle in certain countries. It will always be a battle in humanity. You're always going to be censored, or someone's going to try to stand to you, or big check is going to censor you and you and you.

00:17:45:16 - 00:18:10:18

Brian

You adjust, you pivot, you figure it out. You try things. Things work. Things fail. You just don't give up. That's the thing. You just don't give up. You're going to have you're going to have setbacks. You know, four steps forward, two steps back. But you have, you know, because the goalposts are constantly being moved. And so I have a client all the time.

00:18:10:20 - 00:18:52:17

Brian

There's the email. My Instagram was taken down, my Facebook, my Twitter, my snap, my YouTube. And we want to like, go just tell us the rules. And they're constantly moved because it's about funny. Yeah, sad but true. And so you mentioned I call her daddy, which is a massive brand and has grown incredibly. They're going to be treated different, you know, certain advertising, certain people, certain celebrities, they're not going to face certain things.

00:18:52:17 - 00:19:15:01

Brian

They'll have their other challenges. Don't get me wrong. It's a daily battle. You're going to keep fighting it. You're going to fight through it. You're going to have your days absolute frustration, but you're not going to quit. And that's all you can do. Don't quit it. Just figure it out. Don't let those days get you down. Celebrate the days where you fight through some of that censorship.

00:19:15:03 - 00:19:21:21

Brian

But I unfortunately have to break the news that it's not going away. So we're going to continue.

00:19:21:23 - 00:19:32:06

Luna

Do you have any specific things that you have figured out? I know it's moving targets, but also it's like it seems like there is something now.

00:19:32:08 - 00:19:45:02

Brian

The edges involved. We just cut you off. Yeah, I have nothing in there. And every so often I get an email or a phone call and I just shake my head and go, I have no idea what's happening now.

00:19:45:04 - 00:19:48:22

Luna

Do you work? We still work with some mainstream clients or is it mostly sex work with.

00:19:48:22 - 00:19:50:14

Brian

Oh yeah. Absolutely, absolutely.

00:19:50:16 - 00:20:00:23

Luna

Do you see a difference with how sexy a non sex work related person can be compared to some of like adult companies or performers?

00:20:00:23 - 00:20:26:18

Brian

Blurred. It's so blurred. Hard to say. You know it's really it's blurred. I wish I had a concrete answer and I just don't. Yeah. And no wonder, you know, the only person you could sit down with right now and have this cover, people would be Mark Zuckerberg, Elon Musk and Evan, the owner. Snap. And those are the ones in control.

00:20:26:22 - 00:21:01:15

Brian

You know, they have that power. It's on them ultimately, and they are the deciding factor when it comes to this stuff. You know, it's fascinating because we're so fearful the government government censorship this and that. And it's like, am I really there really? Because so many doors have been opened, it's almost impossible to go back and we're protected by a First Amendment right, and we can only just keep praying that we keep being protected by a First Amendment, which both both sides want to protect just in their own ways.

00:21:01:17 - 00:21:33:01

Brian

It's big tech. They have the power, they make the decisions. And ultimately, you and I are like a spaceship going to asteroids. Let's try not to get knocked knocked up by by an asteroid. Let's just avoid getting hit right. If it's like the spaceships going to keep moving forward. And that's all you can do. And I wish I had better answers, and I'd love for people to come on and give you better answers than I have.

00:21:33:01 - 00:21:42:18

Brian

But I've had plenty of conversations, and for most part, we just push through when things go sideways. In that regard.

00:21:42:20 - 00:22:02:05

Luna

Dang, I was really hoping you would have, like, the perfect piece of wisdom that would solve my trials and tribulations. But okay, well, we'll just have to keep talking about. No, I'm just ever hopeful. I'm like very big hopeful. Okay, so back to work. Also your life, like you love your work. What else do you love in life?

00:22:02:05 - 00:22:08:06

Luna

And then like, what do you love about your work the most? Like what makes you go woo work wise, but also in life?

00:22:08:08 - 00:22:28:19

Brian

Well, we'll do that first. I mean, every, you know, when my clients are happy, I'm happy. And when things are going great with my client, I'm ecstatic. And so little victories are so important. And I always say when I can't enjoy the little victories anymore, it's time to. It's time to stop. My little victories are massive.

00:22:29:00 - 00:22:31:00

Luna

What's an example of a little victory?

00:22:31:02 - 00:22:58:18

Brian

You know, a piece of practice coming out on a client that's positive, an interview that goes really well. You know, maybe something we work on goes viral, you know, whatever it may be, or just that email from a client who is happy with what's going on or sharing some great moments. You know, those are the little victory and the bigger victories are, you know, cover of the New York Times business section for a client add years ago, you know, something with Howard Stern back in the day when we would do more with them, with him.

00:22:58:19 - 00:23:22:20

Brian

So, I mean, there's been all types of victories, big and small. And what that allows me to do is allows me to travel, allows me to experience the world. And that's what's really important to me. I've had a lot of incredible worldly experiences. Every birthday since my 40th, I've spent outside the country in one way, shape or form, somewhere exotic and unique.

00:23:22:20 - 00:23:49:06

Brian

So I'm a big fan of going, you know, I'm just constantly I've got my travel plans tentative for next spring, and I'm excited about, and I love great food. I love great beaches. I love great sunsets. I love being around people from all over the world. And those experiences and work allows me to do that. And so it's a little bit of that.

00:23:49:06 - 00:23:51:08

Brian

Work hard, play hard aspect.

00:23:51:10 - 00:24:05:08

Luna

Okay, I love it. I love I mean, I feel like I, my mom always said, make your work you're playing, you'll never have to work a day in your life. And I think I took it like a little too deep to heart, more so than she ever thought possible. But it's. You know, I totally get that. What?

00:24:05:10 - 00:24:08:01

Luna

Can I ask when your birthday is? What sign are you?

00:24:08:03 - 00:24:28:19

Brian

I am a Virgo. September for. Okay, so I'm a Labor Day birthday, which is beautiful because I get that extra day to sort of travel wherever I want to. Oh, I love. And I didn't let the pandemic stop me either. I found the One Island to open September of 20 that I went to. Good for you didn't everything, but it was amazing.

00:24:28:22 - 00:24:39:04

Luna

That's awesome. Oh my gosh, that's so cool! I would love to hear about your professional origin story. You started at Vivid Entertainment, or was that just the first sexy one.

00:24:39:06 - 00:24:39:21

Brian

For a second?

00:24:40:01 - 00:24:44:02

Luna

Okay, okay, because you were 17 and you were like, music.

00:24:44:04 - 00:25:09:07

Brian

Yeah, I was I was taking out my CD collection and calling record label and no one would touch a 17 year old. Here's a funny story was a Sunday night. So I got a CD from an artist who was on A&M records and located in Hollywood, California. A&M records was on the, old Charlie Chaplin lot, right. And I was going to leave a message.

00:25:09:07 - 00:25:25:20

Brian

Hey, my name is Brian Gross. I'm looking for an internship. Thank you so much. Here's my phone number. If someone can call me that, great. And that's what I would do. And I knew that sort of what to do. So Sunday night I'm like, there's going to be a voicemail. Leave a message. This guy picks up, he goes, hello?

00:25:25:22 - 00:25:41:13

Brian

And it totally caught me off guard. And I go, hey, my name is Brian Gross. I'm, senior in high school. I'm looking for an internship at like. And he cut me off you go the fuck are you doing? Call me right now. It's a fucking Sunday. Why are you calling? You're on a Sunday, and I go click.

00:25:41:15 - 00:26:12:07

Brian

I go, whatever that was, that that was awesome, I want that. So I proceeded to call labels. I got rejected because they wouldn't touch high schoolers. And then I called Def American Recordings. I had like a Black Crowes CD, or maybe it was a Danzig. It was something. And the person who answered the phone was the last hiring at the company, and the last hiring would cover for the receptionist during the lunch hour.

00:26:12:09 - 00:26:37:06

Brian

I think I went home from school and called during the lunch hour. She was in the publicity department. I went down, interviewed, and three days a week I would intern at Def American. If that person worked in any other department, my life would be completely different. But she was in public relations and she still my best friend of Jesus, third, almost 32 years.

00:26:37:08 - 00:27:05:14

Brian

And that's how it started. So no one understood in my high school what the hell I was doing taking my 81 mops to 66, driving from Newbury Park, California to Burbank, three days a week to make press kits and meet art, meet these and unbelievable, like childhood hero type musicians and whatnot and learn the tricks of the trade.

00:27:05:16 - 00:27:13:11

Brian

And I did that from February of 93 until I left for college in August. Wow.

00:27:13:13 - 00:27:18:04

Luna

Do you identify as a person who has like, good people skills?

00:27:18:06 - 00:27:38:19

Brian

I'd like to think so. And they're always tested and like tonight is one of those just wasn't in the mood. Just wanted to go in and do my yoga and get the fuck out. So this one guy pulls his mat next. Hey Kenny, big room. And he's a great guy. Great guy. But I just didn't want to chat.

00:27:38:21 - 00:28:06:10

Brian

So he pulled up next me and I'm just like, hey man, you are. You guys got my vibe of like, all right, we're just gonna just get do it. We're just gonna get through this class and do our thing. But I'm going to say yes with confidence. But knowing that it's it's challenging and it changes. And we've had dramatic Covid and post Covid and tech changes with how we deal with other humans and different generations.

00:28:06:10 - 00:28:27:09

Brian

I'm Gen X, so we've got younger generations that we deal with accordingly, and they communicate in different ways than I grew up communicating. So there's a lot of adjusting. And I you'll I'll use that word a lot to how I communicate with people and how I put people skills to work.

00:28:27:11 - 00:28:35:21

Luna

I love examples, especially if you're like, here's what I noticed with my youngest clients. Here's what I noticed the media millennials like. Is there a difference that you noticed that's articulate?

00:28:36:02 - 00:28:55:00

Brian

Oh my gosh. Let's just go to the dating app okay. Let's just go break them okay. Because when I'm on them I was I remember I was on one and appeared, I was single and that was in a relationship. And then there was a couple breakups. Right. So in those break ups thinking we wouldn't get back together, I go on one of the apps, right?

00:28:55:02 - 00:29:17:17

Brian

And I just remember I'm texting, you know, through the app and I'm like, hey, here's my phone number if you want to talk. Blah, blah. And literally I think we started texting, right? And I called her. She didn't answer. And she texted me, goes, oh, I don't talk on the phone. That was just I was like, wow, okay, okay.

00:29:17:17 - 00:29:32:21

Luna

It's so funny you say that because literally recently I was like, wait a second, I love dating like the 48 to 52 year old range because they just give me calls instead of these text messages. I'm 35 and so like that's a thing. It's a thing.

00:29:32:23 - 00:29:49:10

Brian

My favorite line and it's so whatever. But I'll literally say, hey, I'm using the device for its original reason or its original method. Look at me going, or I'm like, hey, I'm going to go old school. I'm going to call you.

00:29:49:13 - 00:30:05:16

Luna

I see that too. No, I'm like, I'm pretty old school. I would prefer to you just call me when you're available. If I'm available, I'll pick up. If not, I will call you back because I hate, I hate, like, setting times to talk. Unless it's a podcast recording. I'm like, we just. We just do the phone.

00:30:05:18 - 00:30:50:06

Brian

Yeah, I think, but in a serious manner. When you have something serious to talk about with someone, don't do it on text. Yeah, call, talk of she in person is the most ideal eye contact and everything. Otherwise call get get to a place where you're not distracted. I can't tell you. And you might be as guilty as I am of the amount of arguments and the negative discussions that have taken place via text in one's life that really could have been resolved if they were done verbally, you know, and I think it just there's definitely a fear in the aspect of if we get away from that, if we get away from eye contact,

00:30:50:11 - 00:31:13:04

Brian

we get away from talking verbally. If we get away from a physical connection, a hug, touching someone, we have some serious issues in that regard that we're going to be dealing, you know, so I just think it's important. And so the texting aspect of life, yeah, it's great for memes. And this, I.

00:31:13:04 - 00:31:15:00

Luna

Like it for logistic.

00:31:15:02 - 00:31:44:03

Brian

Leo. Absolutely. I even like audio notes. I think audio notes become very unhelpful. You know, you don't have the ability to talk to someone or they're busy or whatnot. You know, sending an audio note helps. But yeah, yeah, the texting is very unhelpful in many, in many ways. And so, I, you know, like I said, I try to use it, but you notice in different generations how they communicate.

00:31:44:04 - 00:32:05:04

Brian

You know, I was talking to my friend, he said his daughter and all her friends, we're talking about 12 and 13 year olds. They're all snap. Everything's reset. Like, okay. And he's got all the parental guards. And I feel for him and his. Why? Because, good God, you've got to put all this stuff on to protect your children, from unwanted people.

00:32:05:04 - 00:32:23:13

Brian

Getting to that. Oh, yeah. And so and that's a serious thing. So it's very, you know, you've adjusted, you know, I mean, you and I listen, I'll say one word, AOL or maybe it's AOL chat room. They were the bomb. They were so much fun. Oh my goodness, they were the best experience.

00:32:23:13 - 00:32:26:08

Luna

Did you ever experience sexy things in there or was it just regular?

00:32:26:09 - 00:33:01:12

Brian

Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. And and just meeting incredible women and conversation. They were so much fun because they were new and they were unknown. And they hadn't been tested by sort of evil nature, evil way. So they were great. I met a few relationships through them. So it's, it was great. But, you know, I, I know there's the common discussion how meeting people via apps and whatnot, though it's becomes over 90% of how strangers meet in this regard.

00:33:01:12 - 00:33:16:19

Brian

It's become very tiresome. And I think we're just too distracted, you know, we're really distracted these days. So if something doesn't keep our attention, we lose it really quickly. And I'm as guilty as anybody in that regard.

00:33:16:21 - 00:33:34:16

Luna

Yeah, I'm kind of opposite. I'm a hyper focuser. And as a person who struggles to read social signals, even when I have all the signals in front of me, I had to learn that text message lesson pretty early on. But, do you ever meet people in person, or is it mostly okay?

00:33:34:18 - 00:33:54:21

Brian

Yeah, no. Yeah, absolutely. And I love meeting people in person. And, you know, beauty of travel is doing that. You know, beauty is eating at a bar, in a restaurant in a foreign country. She's a there's a good tendency you're going to get into a conversation with someone. People who travel know people who travel. And there's there's a communication there that's pretty special.

00:33:54:23 - 00:34:16:02

Brian

So, yeah, less so. I mean, yeah, here at home, I'll meet for coffee or drink or dinner or whatnot. Certainly. Absolutely. I do enjoy it more. And in foreign countries, I definitely enjoy it more when you're just in that surrounding of a different place, and you and that other person and sometimes are locals. Don't get me wrong.

00:34:16:04 - 00:34:37:22

Brian

But I'm a big fan, big fan of that type of interaction. You know, I, I'll go to dinner alone. I went to dinner alone. I took a trip to Puerto Vallarta for Thanksgiving and had three wonderful dinners. And I met people at the restaurant was that and had wonderful conversation. People aren't afraid to talk to someone if you're in that same setting.

00:34:38:00 - 00:35:01:23

Brian

You know, it's like we're both here for the same reason. Enjoy this beautiful setting. Enjoy this incredible food. We both, whoever may be discovered this place so we know it's good. You know, I'm bougie in that regard. So I'm going to go to really nice restaurants when I travel. So whoever's there is going to be people that are on your wavelength.

00:35:02:01 - 00:35:20:16

Luna

I love that, I love meeting people wherever I go. I am a person that will, like, strike up a conversation because when I was traveling solo long term in 2016, I learned to take myself out on dates and to talk to people wherever I go. And I think that that's I don't know if that's, there is also something about the travel thing that's a little bit.

00:35:20:16 - 00:35:36:03

Luna

Well, here's a question. Do you think it's romantic? I'm trying to figure out what exactly is romantic. And I know it's also a moving target, but do you think that like meeting people when traveling? Because there's that kind of like ephemeral? We're not necessarily going to be here. Is that romantic to you or what do you think romantic is?

00:35:36:07 - 00:36:14:13

Brian

Have we not all watched after before sunrise and before sunset? I mean, come on, come on. Of course. Give it. It is, it's it's there's a romanticism to it. And I think you come into it if you're single with a romanticism, are you going to. And yes, there have been plenty of trips, plenty of experiences. God blessed where I've been fortunate to meet someone and enjoy an experience with with said person, and whether it continues or whether it and what have you.

00:36:14:15 - 00:36:19:19

Brian

So be it. But yeah, 100%.

00:36:19:21 - 00:36:25:02

Luna

Okay, so I would love to hear what is sexy to you.

00:36:25:04 - 00:36:46:23

Brian

Wow. I think it's the unknown. I think it's that feeling. I think it's something that you just when your skin, when the hair stands up, when you just have a a reaction and you know, it can come. Listen, the food versus sex debate is amazing. I always love that one because I had great too. And I've had great sex.

00:36:47:00 - 00:37:17:23

Brian

But, it's a it's a feeling and a reaction and whatever it is to each of them, for me to label it specifically would be an endearing to so many people. For me, it's that unknown. You know, I think it's the unknown. It's the eyes locking. It's the smile. It's the potential touch potential, whatever it may be, whatever the, you know, excursion or whatever the, environment, whatever, whatever may occur.

00:37:18:01 - 00:37:29:16

Brian

All of that has the potential of sexiness and enticement and excitement. And so I'm a big fan of that unknown aspects. Yeah. You know, it's pretty exciting.

00:37:29:18 - 00:37:44:18

Luna

Totally. I'm a big fan of novelty, which is, for me, big unknown. And I bet through your work, I would imagine that you are exposed to many different types or definitions of sexy, right? Like you probably see a whole array.

00:37:44:20 - 00:38:11:00

Brian

Yeah, I mean, I'm, I'm around people who have whatever their sexiness is to sell per se, but also whatever it is. Yeah, no, I've seen so much and so many different kinds and and it's definitely exciting in that regard. And you just conjures up so many stories and memories. Yeah. But, yeah. Absolutely, absolutely. Seen the widest variety.

00:38:11:00 - 00:38:14:14

Brian

And it's it's fun. It's a lot of fun.

00:38:14:16 - 00:38:30:16

Luna

Okay. If you had to rate yourself on a sexual shame, a meter with ten being super full of shame and zero being like, I don't have any. I would love to hear where you fall today and how it has shamed culture squiggle over the years, especially if work is a part of that at all for you.

00:38:30:18 - 00:38:58:11

Brian

I'll never say I'm one. There's a 2 or 3 there's always going to be, I can be pretty vanilla in that regard. But it really was nine. It was definitely like, I don't know how this works. What am I doing? It was definitely a teenager collecting hugs and taking a good day was how many girls I hugged that day, you know, and then, you know, and and then but there's always a 2 or 3 and there's always self-doubt.

00:38:58:13 - 00:39:21:03

Brian

I mean, there's there's the Virgo mentality of pleasing other versus yourself. Right? That's very big with Virgos. And I'm certainly akin to that. But and then there's like, yeah, yeah, there's it's two. It's never one. It's it's three, 2 or 3 in that regard. But it started at ten. That's for damn sure.

00:39:21:09 - 00:39:39:01

Luna

Wow. Oh yeah I mean the beautiful gift of Virgo is they are devotional refiners. You know, they they're the they can look at something and edit it and that can veer into the hypercritical two and very could be very self-focused, hypercritical too.

00:39:39:01 - 00:39:42:23

Brian

But you have to send me that. That was brilliant to say that again.

00:39:43:01 - 00:40:01:06

Luna

I there are devotional refiners, you know, that Virgo is the at the harshest. They can be the critic or the self critic, but they are worshipers or some of the best worshipers, because there's that concrete groundedness that comes with the willingness to tend, you know, they're there for the harvest. So they're like, I'll see you through. There's a patience.

00:40:01:08 - 00:40:21:05

Brian

And the worshiping can can be good in that because you give yes, and then you feel depleted. And if the person doesn't replenish you, that's where a Virgo can be like, shout, you know, give me something you don't have to give me as much as I give you, but give me something.

00:40:21:07 - 00:40:43:18

Luna

Yeah, it's got to be a balance. Well, and I'm, I'm a Taurus, so I'm another Earth sign. And I have learned through trial and tribulation that sometimes especially like air or water signs think that they're giving me stuff. And I'm like, this is nothing like I don't feel anything here, you know? So finding that balance with someone where I can experience the gift they're giving me, you know.

00:40:43:20 - 00:40:47:22

Brian

I've had my run in with Geminis in Libra.

00:40:48:00 - 00:40:48:20

Luna

Oh, yeah.

00:40:48:22 - 00:40:55:19

Brian

Sure. And. Oh, yeah, that's a whole too real. That's a whole other thing going there.

00:40:55:21 - 00:41:19:15

Luna

Well, it's it's funny because, like, for me, I can get along with fire signs. Super. You know, people who have that strong passion, I'm like, yeah, passion. Touch me. That's concrete, you know? But for sometimes I'm like, it's just a lot of words floating around up there or like, those are big feelings. And like, you're throwing them at me and it's not, you know, so, so I know that, I totally know what you feel or what you mean in finding that balance that needing to receive to what?

00:41:19:18 - 00:41:23:14

Luna

What are some of your favorite ways to receive from a partner?

00:41:23:16 - 00:41:29:23

Brian

I mean, I love the simplest of things. I don't need much. And I say that in this regard, touch is important.

00:41:30:01 - 00:41:32:05

Luna

Yeah.

00:41:32:07 - 00:42:02:19

Brian

Boy, it's an interesting question right now for me because there's some memory and recollection going on based on something that ended earlier this year. In the aspect of like what's missing right now. And it's like these little things, I've always felt like I don't need much. Now, there might be past partners that would totally disagree, and I can totally understand why they would, but I'm not a material person in that regard.

00:42:02:21 - 00:42:31:13

Brian

It just there's feelings needing to be loved, right? Pretty basic. Certainly not easy. And I'm definitely not the easiest person. And being a workaholic and being independent, it and other challenges it they lead to can lead to friction. But, I've always thought, hey, just make me feel good and and do it in your way.

00:42:31:13 - 00:42:52:06

Brian

You know, I'm not looking for it. Have to be specific. You know, it has to be like this. No, I want to know. I want you to do it where you're enjoying as I as much as I'm receiving. So I like to keep it simple. But I know that. What if someone from my past list, they could. They could laugh.

00:42:52:08 - 00:42:53:06

Brian

It was a.

00:42:53:06 - 00:42:55:06

Luna

Totally.

00:42:55:08 - 00:43:06:05

Brian

There's certainly things that I've been a complete bitch. Pain in the ass nightmare, don't get me wrong. But, you know, we've all we've all had our Saturns returned, so.

00:43:06:05 - 00:43:25:06

Luna

Yeah, they do. Well, if if we're at least 28 to 29, we've had a Saturn return. If we're not there yet, we're still getting tested in every house. But this is not an astrology podcast I would love to hear. How did you learn about sex? We heard about your first ejaculation. Your first experience. Did you get any sort of like sex ed ahead of time?

00:43:25:06 - 00:43:30:19

Luna

Like take us through your formative timeline, maybe starting with what you remember hearing first?

00:43:30:21 - 00:43:54:13

Brian

Let's just go to the car. Right? Let's just go to the old man having to have the conversation. I don't remember what age I am. I know I'll give you a movie and I'll give you a movie. I'll give you a two movie. The conversation at night driving on PCH. Why I'm PCH, I don't know, I don't know where we were going.

00:43:54:13 - 00:44:21:05

Brian

I don't know where we were coming from. But, you know, I'm in your life. You have those moments that you'll never forget. Well, my birds and the bees from the old man was in the car at night, him driving, obviously, and giving me the speech. Uncomfortably for him, uncomfortably for me along PCH in like some sort of Buick, Buick or saber.

00:44:21:07 - 00:44:47:02

Brian

Who knows? But, that was it. So that was that. Then there's two moments. There's two movies. My mom took my brother and I to see the movie Skin Deep, starring John Ritter, 19. God, I want to stay 86, 7 or 8, probably 88. The Eagle. Look it up. And my mom goes to the girl at the thing.

00:44:47:02 - 00:45:00:20

Brian

I think it was PG 13, which is crazy. If it's R, it should be R. It's crazy. And the girl my mom goes, is this movie okay for two boys? And she goes, yeah, it's fine. Are you coming with the movie?

00:45:01:01 - 00:45:04:01

Luna

I am not, and I'm so curious. I got to go watch.

00:45:04:03 - 00:45:40:03

Brian

The opening scene. Charmander is getting his haircut at like a girl. How? And the scene cuts to her cutting the hair. But every time she steps in the scene, there's less clothing. And before you know it, she's up. Oh, there's also the, the glow in the dark condom. See? All right. It's a terribly horrible movie. So that experience with my mother and my brother in a movie, and then the most intense is the movie The Doors, starring Val Kilmer and my old man.

00:45:40:03 - 00:46:05:04

Brian

And I watch that on the couch, and that warped me for day. That is one of the most intense, you know, that's that's an intense movie. There's a lot of sex in that movie. So I could say those three, because I don't remember what I learned in high school, for fuck's sake. Like, you know, I just couldn't tell you what course or what it was like.

00:46:05:04 - 00:46:28:13

Brian

I remember how I passed chemistry, but I don't want to admit that, The fact I got a B in chemistry is my greatest achievement ever. But, I just it those three things stand out from my year. As far as what? Where did you get your knowledge? And and you look back and you're like, Jesus Christ, thank God.

00:46:28:15 - 00:46:32:13

Brian

I can somewhat normal me.

00:46:32:15 - 00:46:34:08

Luna

Or any of us were.

00:46:34:09 - 00:46:58:20

Brian

Just not, you know, and you know, communication was so weak in that regards. You know, growing up, you know, from family and whatnot. So I mean, those are the three standard genre the skinny Val Kilmer in the Doors movie and The Birds and the bees talk on PCH. And my with my dad in the in a Buick.

00:46:58:22 - 00:47:11:01

Luna

Okay. And so if you were like an adorable young man who was counting the number of hugs he got to have with girls, well, first of all, it sounds like you were pretty clear on the fact that you're straight. Like, did you always know you were straight?

00:47:11:03 - 00:47:45:18

Brian

That's so funny. Yes. Okay. However, when you're a choirboy, everyone thinks you're gay. Yeah. And so. And mind you, there were gay men, young gay men in choir in high school, and we all just made fun of each other. Well, straight, gay, whatever. And we all said some pretty horrible things to each other when you look back. But, like, I didn't really understand homosexuality at a young age, just I no comprehension.

00:47:45:20 - 00:48:09:21

Brian

But at the same time, I was called gay because I was in choir and I was just like it always just it never fazed zebra offended by this or that because, yeah, I'm a fucking skinned, scrawny kid. And choir like that was just sort of not gang like, oh, if you're in choir, you're gay. Oh, okay. Seems pretty stupid, but whatever.

00:48:09:23 - 00:48:36:00

Brian

But yeah, I just remember the switch from six to seventh grade from going. I could care less about girls to all I cared about. So always hetero, always, you know, interested in girls and women. And it's just been that way my whole life. So, but, you know, we we make joke like, I love a lot of what would be called gay music.

00:48:36:05 - 00:49:01:23

Brian

I hate, like, I've grown up listening to all kinds of music and work, you know, but if you think I'm gay because I love Depeche Mode, I'm sorry for you. Because those words are going home. And so, yeah, I've seen erasure multiple times. They're fantastic. Like, you know, I love musicals. I've been musical like it's just on and on and on, but you're just like, I don't know, you want to think that?

00:49:01:23 - 00:49:10:12

Brian

So I've never fought it. I've always made it. It's always made me laugh. And if a woman ever felt that way, I'd be like, well, I can show you so late.

00:49:10:14 - 00:49:18:22

Luna

Did you ever talk about sex with brother of friends? Anyone like that in your formative years? Or did you just, like, learn on the fly?

00:49:19:00 - 00:49:42:08

Brian

Yeah, I was definitely on the fly. Definitely on the fly. It was. It was very much a loner, you know? It was very much a kept to myself. I had a few close friends, but it wasn't. There was a major sexuality. We just talked about girls. But, you know, there was never major talks. So there was definitely learning on the fly in that regard.

00:49:42:10 - 00:50:07:17

Brian

And like I said, my introduction to pornography, like most men my age as young men, where the unmarked VHS tapes, when your father would tape the Playboy Channel and just light them underneath, with all the other VHS and, you know, there might be, a taping of Rocky three, and there also might be a tape with, who knows, a game show, and, oh, this one's black, but that one, it.

00:50:07:19 - 00:50:16:14

Brian

So, the introduction was very much on the fly. And I think for a lot of men my age. Yeah, it was on the fly.

00:50:16:16 - 00:50:30:03

Luna

That is, that is what I've gleaned from my personal experiences and interviewing people. This is. Yeah. Okay. Are you the type of straight though, that would have a threesome with another penis person?

00:50:30:05 - 00:51:01:19

Brian

I would, I never have. Full disclosure, I have a two. I would not, yeah, I wouldn't be against it. It's just something that that hasn't happened. I've certainly been in a room where, like, another couple were having sex and I was having sex with someone, but there was, you know, never in that regard. And again, if you're talking to a pretty vanilla guy in regards to my own life and lifestyle, you know, so never been in an orgy, you know, never done a gangbang.

00:51:01:19 - 00:51:23:00

Brian

Never. You know, there's lots of nevers and oh, and if I die tomorrow, it doesn't happen. Hey. I'm good. How smutty. From here on out, I have a friend of mine that constantly wants me to find a someone for that. Because he wants to know to be around me. He just. He's just a wild person who is like, find us a certain girl and let's party.

00:51:23:06 - 00:51:26:07

Brian

It's like, I'll keep track.

00:51:26:09 - 00:51:48:12

Luna

Okay, so you know a guy who's who's down if someone. Okay, okay. That's good to know. That's funny. I feel like I'm always the person also getting asked, and I'm like, it's not always quite like that. Okay. What have you learned about sex through having it over the years? Like, what do you love? What are you into? It sounds like you are self-described vanilla, but I think vanilla is the most delicious bass flavor.

00:51:48:12 - 00:52:00:03

Luna

So tell us like sensations, experiences, or just anything that you have. Kind of like even cool locations on your travels. Like what stands out when you reflect upon your sexual learnings?

00:52:00:05 - 00:52:21:16

Brian

I think a lot goes with the experiences, whether it was with a partner at the time and a lot of funny experiences. I'll tell you a funny one and I'll leave names out. This person and I, we're getting to know each other. And then on a whim, we decided to go to another city. I'm going to be so vague just for this.

00:52:21:18 - 00:52:37:19

Brian

Yeah? Yeah. Perfect. We decided we decided to go out of town, a road trip, and we couldn't find a hotel. Less than that, we finally found a hotel. They didn't have rooms. They're going to get us a room somewhere else. We were drinking and push comes to shove. And then for, you know, we hadn't done anything. And now we're having sex.

00:52:37:21 - 00:52:51:18

Brian

And we were both intoxicated and I did a full lip off the bed and stuck my landing. And then we continued having sex. And I was just so impressed with myself.

00:52:51:20 - 00:52:54:19

Luna

I, I'm very impressed.

00:52:54:21 - 00:53:15:13

Brian

I got full flip off the bed and and then the next day we were at breakfast and we just looked at each other, hung over as fuck, and we're like, here we go, we're going to do it. We're apart. Let's go. And we're together. For almost four years there for were you. So that was fun.

00:53:15:15 - 00:53:18:02

Luna

Yeah. You're super vanilla,

00:53:18:04 - 00:53:56:11

Brian

I mean, I was, I was at a Narcos style party in the middle of Perdida, Colombia, pre-pandemic, this party had a 100 cam model. It had a seven course meal. It had other things that might not be illegal. It had fireworks. It had a stage. It was on a property. We stayed on a lot. And I wound up hooking up with, like the most gorgeous Colombian girl and like.

00:53:56:13 - 00:54:05:15

Brian

But then I also remember like it not working like it works, but only to a certain extent, because I might have partaken in party favors and whatnot.

00:54:05:17 - 00:54:06:08

Luna

Sure, sure.

00:54:06:09 - 00:54:26:18

Brian

I think it would great out of fucking Narcos. It was insane. And I never been to a party like that. And I will never be at a party like that again. No question. It was wild. And, but I just remember, like, I think we're in the shower and I'm like, oh, God, just to just get through the night.

00:54:26:18 - 00:54:50:08

Brian

Just just don't be a loser. And then I remember waking up the next day and she was gone already, but I just looked out the window and saw Dale, and I was just like, where am I? I was all over for like two days after that, but it was wild. Wild. And the ratio was insane. It was one of those ratios that you're like, remember this?

00:54:50:13 - 00:55:15:03

Brian

This might never happen again in your life kind of ratio. And that was fun. I never had sex with the Playboy Mansion. I certainly met girls and went to parties there and had a lot of fun, but did not have sex there. And the Playboy Mansion is absolutely best. It's absolutely best. It was so incredible to go to events there.

00:55:15:05 - 00:55:16:16

Brian

It was really incredible.

00:55:16:19 - 00:55:19:17

Luna

Well, what do you remember? What was it like?

00:55:19:19 - 00:55:48:00

Brian

It was just, you know, people would rent it out for parties from all different aspects of businesses and whatnot. And, you know, I whether I'll come with clients or with friends or. Yeah, you saw the grotto and got tours, and my favorite thing was the two camps because he because he had all these different animals there. So you get a tour from one of the playmates and you would, you know, like, oh, and there's the two camps and you're just like, there are fucking two camps in the middle of fucking southern Gulf.

00:55:48:02 - 00:56:12:01

Brian

Wow. You know, they had a golf tournament at the LA opened last year. One of the whole is backed up to the mansion and the birds still live there. Whoever owns the house, whatever. But the birds are still there, so there's birds chirping. Unlike the East key of professional golfers are taking off in a major. So it became the story during the tournament.

00:56:12:01 - 00:56:40:08

Brian

Like, yeah, there's a certain tee box backed up to a certain house where there are certain birds going. So, I mean, I had a, I went to Japan, went to Tokyo for 40 hours, and I was making out with the girl at 4 a.m. that I just met that evening before flying back to the state. I was just, you know, I've, I had incredible trips through Europe and South America just for Dick.

00:56:40:08 - 00:56:42:20

Brian

Columbia. Yeah. Been there seven times.

00:56:43:01 - 00:56:50:01

Luna

Oh, it's one of my. It's one of my favorite places. The nicest people. They're so nice to me. Everyone. Everyone was so nice.

00:56:50:03 - 00:56:53:19

Brian

There they have. I think they're arguably some of the happiest people.

00:56:53:21 - 00:57:08:17

Luna

Yeah, literally. I was like, in a hot tub. Some people came in the. Can we join you? I mean, my broken Spanish. But they were just like, don't you love our beautiful country? Do you want to have some more beautiful drinks? Compete with us? You're so beautiful. I was like, yes, everything is beautiful. Life is beautiful here.

00:57:08:23 - 00:57:40:01

Brian

Met a beautiful girl in, Palencia, and she took me to her families. And she was more, And I was in a bar. You know, and I had one of the best years I had because we just partied. They just partied. They fed me so well. Yeah. And just had this beautiful night with this beautiful people that, you know, are just like, oh, my God, this is one of the poorest areas I've ever seen.

00:57:40:03 - 00:58:00:13

Brian

And and they were just so giving and so happy. And you're just like, it just proves you know what money can and can't do, but also when you can, if you've got just enough, you can make something out of nothing. And I felt very safe and I had a beautiful experience. It was really lovely.

00:58:00:15 - 00:58:10:16

Luna

Okay. You said that it sounds like women approach you. Were you like aggressive ones? They just picked you just get picked. Or do you have some moves like you just like you meet people in real life?

00:58:10:18 - 00:58:36:15

Brian

I don't think I have moves, I really don't. I mean, my biggest rule is always end with a question and you'll learn really quickly if someone wants to continue the conversation. It all starts with the conversation. And I'm not a big liner guy and I'm fairly shy in that regard, but I, I yeah, I definitely am. So excuse me.

00:58:36:15 - 00:58:59:08

Brian

So it's, you know, it's go with the flow. You know if you, if it feels the relationships that have happened I've been go with, go with the flow in that regard and see where it goes. So I was going to Dallas, Texas. I was working at Elektra Records 1997, 96 to 99, and I was going to Dallas.

00:58:59:08 - 00:59:21:02

Brian

I had three different artists performing, so I went to Dallas Chat room, hey, what's going on? Blah blah. And I start talking to this girl and we don't meet that trip, whatever. But we we kept talking, so. So she flew to LA to meet me. I went out the night before and for what it's worth, a lot of my stories involve alcohol, God bless it.

00:59:21:04 - 00:59:44:09

Brian

But I got I went to a show and got wasted, and I show up the next day about as hard for getting this person was showing up the first time we meet. Is she sitting in my office? Nobody in the office knew, like no one knew anything. And I took her to my house and we started a relation, a long distance relationship, until she moved to LA.

00:59:44:11 - 01:00:13:05

Brian

But, And I will chat room didn't meet in Dallas. She comes to L.A. And that's how it started. So. But I'll never forget her sitting across in the chair from my desk. Me just hurting and me just going out and looking at people, the office and going. Nobody fucking knows why this girl is here. How she got here, how we met like nothing.

01:00:13:06 - 01:00:24:13

Brian

And it was so taboo at the time. You know very well that was very funny in that regard. But it was a it was a great relationship for, for a few years.

01:00:24:15 - 01:00:35:01

Luna

Wow. Is there anything that you like haven't explored yet that you want to explore? Like what's on the bucket list? And it doesn't have to be sexy, but also sexy.

01:00:35:03 - 01:00:57:10

Brian

I've been fortunate. I've seen incredible sports, see my teams win championships. I've been to over 900 concerts in my life. I reached the point in my life for my own mental sanity where I'm like, it's house money now. Whatever happens, whatever I do, so be it. I don't have an answer to that question. Where I go, oh, it's x, Y or Z, I don't know.

01:00:57:12 - 01:01:14:15

Brian

And there's an unknown. I think it's the unknown. I enjoy them, you know, my friend, friend of mine reached out to me and said, do you want to come with me to Israel, which I've been to, in 25 for an excursion. And he does. He has this group, and they go to different parts of Israel and the culture and everything.

01:01:14:15 - 01:01:39:01

Brian

And I'm like, man, I'd love to spend a couple weeks in Israel. I've spent time there. But to be with a group and this and that, someone calls me tomorrow and said, hey, do you want to do this? Yeah, I went to the World Cup on a whim. I went, I called it my weekend in the Middle East because I was looking at I was watching the World Cup in 22, going, and I should, I should just go like I have a laptop, booked a flight, booked a hotel wasn't that expensive.

01:01:39:03 - 01:01:54:07

Brian

And before I knew it, I was there for the weekend and before I knew it, I had a ticket to the final that I got four hours before the match from a guy I met in the lobby. So, I mean, I can't tell you what it's going to be, but it's going to be something, you know, I turned 40 in Havana.

01:01:54:07 - 01:02:15:00

Brian

I want to turn 50 in Havana. That's my goal earlier this year to go back. I've been there twice, and I have an affinity for the island. To answer your question, I don't know, but I love that part because hopefully I'm going to be sitting with you in a few years where I do this again, and I'm going to be like, remember that question you asked me?

01:02:15:02 - 01:02:17:03

Brian

Well, here's what happened in that time.

01:02:17:05 - 01:02:32:08

Luna

Oh, I love updates, I love updates, and I also would love to know if you have any like dream projects or clients or like work related future thing. You know, it sounds like you're a very go with the flow. Virgo. I don't think I've ever met a Virgo as go with the flow as you are.

01:02:32:11 - 01:02:52:13

Brian

Pretty bizarre. I mean, I'm I probably work with Baby and Expo, which is the largest adult gaming in the world. And, I, you know, post-Covid, it's been exciting to come back and see people that I see once a year and meet people. And we're back at the Virgin in the end of January, so I'm really excited.

01:02:52:15 - 01:03:20:18

Brian

Yeah. About that. And it'll be another incredible experience. And, and for me, I love the clients that I have, whether it's content creators, adult film stars, musicians getting hired by more music stuff again, and I take that on and off independent film outside of adult mainstream, independent film, different types of projects that I definitely love. And there's an unknown aspect there because a lot of my clientele has been word of mouth where someone goes, hey, I worked with Brian, you should hire him.

01:03:20:18 - 01:03:40:12

Brian

So on and so forth. So it's a constant in that regard in this time of year being at the holidays, things winding now, I get, I get to sort of settle in but get everything in place and get ready for the new year. I do enjoy that. I'm not a fan of the holidays point blank to be on, but I do enjoy the set up for the new year.

01:03:40:12 - 01:03:54:18

Brian

And then before you know it, you have CDs and I might have clients there and got ABN, a different expos or whatnot. So January's crazy month and I in the spring all I planned out some international travel that I'm excited about.

01:03:54:20 - 01:04:03:18

Luna

That's awesome. So you're like working with avian, but then I bet you also have clients who are like there. Or is it just crazy for you? What is that like?

01:04:04:00 - 01:04:31:22

Brian

Yeah. It's insane. So my team, we work on helping our clients, helping all the exhibitors, helping everybody, you know, helping all the media that we have. We'll have another 750 to 1000 media people attending. It's it's crazy. But my first avian, my first ever going was 2000. My first working with the avian team was 2007. And then I wound up taking it over in 2013, I think.

01:04:32:00 - 01:04:43:13

Brian

So it's been almost a decade getting the honor of being the publicist for the company and the expo. So it's, very much something I keep an eye record lover.

01:04:43:15 - 01:04:53:06

Luna

I would love to hear with all your wisdom, how do you think we collectively can create a more connected, loving, world filled world?

01:04:53:08 - 01:04:55:00

Brian

Get off our phones.

01:04:55:01 - 01:04:56:12

Luna

01:04:56:14 - 01:04:58:02

Brian

It's sad.

01:04:58:04 - 01:05:00:03

Luna

And then do it instead.

01:05:00:05 - 01:05:23:11

Brian

Look at each other. Talk to each other. We're getting away from it. You think about it, and I'm. Listen, pot kettle. Guilty as charged. But we're getting to a place that's getting scary in the aspect of the lack of human connection, the lack of desire of human connection. And so I wish I could tell you where it's going to go.

01:05:23:11 - 01:05:48:04

Brian

I don't know, but we've seen it move so fast. We've seen technology in our lifetime. Most of us. But the basic necessity of a hug and the physical touch that we all need in one way, shape or form can't get away from it. You can't. And so if everyone can take it upon themselves to just be kind and loving to another, you know, not easy.

01:05:48:06 - 01:06:12:06

Brian

I wish I could sit here and preach Kumbaya and shit. I can't do it. I've got issues myself. There's pieces of judgment that go around. But, you know, you do your best. You do your best to look out for one another, to help one another. And that's the best you can do. And ultimately, you look in the mirror and go, am I doing what I can to make someone else feel good?

01:06:12:07 - 01:06:16:09

Brian

You know, that's the biggest. Those are incredible challenges.

01:06:16:11 - 01:06:33:18

Luna

Yeah. Well, and as I hear you talk, I can't help but wonder, like, do you think it really is a lack of desire, or do you think that there is a spike in anxiety and fear when it comes to how to connect? Because I noticed we don't have too many social norms as we grow outside of our little community, bubbles.

01:06:33:20 - 01:07:04:15

Brian

Yeah, I think it's about I think there's more, you know, lack of desire or anxiety, fear, being pulled in a million direction. Yeah. You know, YOLO, FOMO, all the acronyms. I think it all builds up and affects us, not just one thing. So we have to be stronger than those, right? We have to push through those. Not easy, you know, very challenging.

01:07:04:17 - 01:07:23:15

Brian

Like I said, I'm I'm a yoga addict now. I'm in a class almost five nights a week and a few times on the weekend. It's just like where I find my clarity, my sanity is to get out of that and sweat it out, be in my thoughts, right? Because that's where you are. When you're on a yoga mat, say what you.

01:07:23:15 - 01:07:52:02

Brian

Well, the biggest challenge is between your hair. Not not the physical part, you know. So that's the aspect that will, you know, do you think, you know? So, I, we could list all the reasons and all of the effects that we deal with, their challenges and we have to overcome every single one and hard to do it alone, easier with a team.

01:07:52:04 - 01:07:57:20

Brian

And hopefully people can find those people that will help them in in those regards.

01:07:57:22 - 01:08:00:02

Luna

Oh yeah. Okay. Last question.

01:08:00:04 - 01:08:00:18

Brian

Yeah.

01:08:00:20 - 01:08:05:06

Luna

How do you like to spread ripples of love?

01:08:05:08 - 01:08:13:03

Brian

Oh man. Ripples of love. Well I would just hug everybody with.

01:08:13:09 - 01:08:15:09

Luna

Your hug first. I love that.

01:08:15:11 - 01:08:36:14

Brian

I wear to hug everybody and then I get in trouble. But nonetheless, I will hug everybody. I I'm a hugger. I'm a believer. I'm going to put my hand on your back. I'm going to touch you. You know, I just if it's touching and, mind you, in a proper manner.

01:08:36:17 - 01:08:37:08

Luna

Yeah, yeah.

01:08:37:13 - 01:08:47:06

Brian

But if physical touch is wrong, I don't want to be right because it is arguably one of the greatest sensations. You know that feeling? Yeah. It makes everything better.

01:08:47:08 - 01:08:51:11

Luna

It gives us oxytocin. It helps us feel connected to people. It's important.

01:08:51:12 - 01:08:54:21

Brian

Yeah. So I would say touch.

01:08:54:23 - 01:09:06:10

Luna

I love the lovers. You can follow him at BSG, PR on X and Instagram. Brian, thank you so much for being a guest with us.

01:09:06:12 - 01:09:16:16

Brian

Thank you for having me. This was so much fun. I've definitely opened up to you in a public forum that I never had. So, you made me feel incredibly comfortable and I appreciate it.

01:09:16:18 - 01:09:24:00

Luna

I am honored to me, to me, that is spreading ripples of love, sharing your stories and and being willing to meet me. So thank you.

01:09:24:02 - 01:09:24:12

Brian

Thank you.