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Straight cis female, she/her pronouns, monogamous, co-founder of Personal Fav Co, from Boston, Los Angeles-based, into: acts of service, strong communicators, men who are loud, educated feminists, and morning sex.

🔗 HANNAH LINKS | Use the code FAV25 to get a discount and support your pleasure: personalfav.co / @personalfavco

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00:00:00:02 - 00:00:24:13

Luna

And our guest today is a straight cis female in a monogamous hetero relationship who is into acts of service, strong communicators, men who are loud, educated feminists and mourning sex. She is the co-founder of Personal Fave Co and is on a mission to empower diffuse shame and stigma around sex and educate others to prioritize their pleasure, including knowing and understanding the ingredients in their products.

00:00:24:15 - 00:00:29:04

Luna

Originally from Boston, she's been in L.A. for over a decade now. Welcome, Hannah.

00:00:29:06 - 00:00:30:17

Hannah

Thank you. What an.

00:00:30:17 - 00:00:33:06

Hannah

Intro. I'm blushing. I'm so happy to be here.

00:00:33:10 - 00:00:51:06

Luna

I am so excited to have you here. Can you start off by telling our lovely listeners, if you had to rate yourself today on a sexual shame meter, with ten being the most full of shame and zero being like, who cares about shame? Where do you fall today, right now? And do you ever get a squiggly shame coaster ride?

00:00:51:07 - 00:01:02:01

Hannah

I definitely get a shame, a coaster ride, I would say to them before and before I started this business, I was probably a lot higher and so. Wow.

00:01:02:06 - 00:01:09:14

Luna

So you started this business with a high shame leader. What does that like and why and how?

00:01:09:16 - 00:01:38:22

Hannah

I when I was approached, let's dive right in. And I was approached by my co-founder Stephanie. She came to me from a clean product standpoint, not like a sexual standpoint. And I was at a clean product business, and I found myself feeling sheepish and I was like, this is weird. Why am I having this bodily reaction to, like, consulting for for starting this company with her when it is, like, so beautiful and empowering?

00:01:39:00 - 00:02:02:12

Hannah

I'm super positive and I was so worried about validation from others and how others would receive it. And that's when I was like, okay, now I have to do it. If I if this is like what's happening inside of me, then like something is wrong, I need to like tap into that and go all the way in because like, I should not have this feeling with something that shouldn't like this.

00:02:02:13 - 00:02:22:15

Hannah

It's so beautifully powerful. Why am I feeling shy and sheepish? Not that shy is a bad thing, but I was just like. I felt like a little shame. And then I was like this. I need to, like, listen to what's happening in here. Because this whispers becoming a scream, and I need to, like, release it. And then we started a company mid lid.

00:02:22:17 - 00:02:33:13

Luna

Oh my God, I love people like you who are like yeah, I was really, really terrified. So I thought I'd just like, dive right into it. Have you always been like that?

00:02:33:15 - 00:02:34:18

Hannah

I.

00:02:34:20 - 00:02:39:16

Hannah

I am an extroverted extrovert. I'm very Capricorn.

00:02:39:16 - 00:02:44:08

Hannah

So like, I think I have been, but this.

00:02:44:08 - 00:02:53:00

Hannah

Type of endeavor had never presented itself where I've been willing to take such a risk. And I said, fuck it.

00:02:53:01 - 00:02:55:11

Hannah

Oh, I've got a fucking love that.

00:02:55:13 - 00:03:05:20

Luna

Okay. So in your like day to day life now, what contexts do you notice it's squiggling up and down. Like are there people or places where it gets higher or lower?

00:03:05:22 - 00:03:09:19

Hannah

It's so refreshing when it gets lower. Like it's.

00:03:09:20 - 00:03:10:22

Hannah

The.

00:03:11:00 - 00:03:28:06

Hannah

Such an exhale of a moment when someone asks you what you do and you tell them they're like, that's incredible. And I'm like, okay, what I'm doing kicks ass. And then other times people be like, what do you do for work? And I'm like, I need lube. And like for cars. And I'm like, oh, no.

00:03:28:08 - 00:03:33:10

Hannah

For some modeling. Oh, and my shame doesn't go up because.

00:03:33:10 - 00:04:03:12

Hannah

As but especially now that I've been in it for three plus years. But for me, I also felt myself getting defensive when I would feel shame going up and be like, what's wrong with that? Instead of being like, oh, I should be curious because I too once was curious about feeling, you know, diving deep. Being loud about intimacy because I was really sex positive in conversations with my girlfriends and ingredients in relationships.

00:04:03:12 - 00:04:24:13

Hannah

Why can't I bring that to more people? And so when I get presented in situations where other people I can feel are judging instead of my shame going up now, I'm like, okay, I'm not going to like, judge this person for judging me. I'm going to be curious and try to figure out where they're coming from and like, but the mic drops on them.

00:04:24:13 - 00:04:33:01

Hannah

Did you know this? Did you know that? Happy to educate you, welcome you into a comfortable conversation. It's been fun. I've learned so much about myself.

00:04:33:03 - 00:04:50:14

Luna

Wow, I really love that. I am still. That gives me so much to reflect on because I feel like even I still have these moments where I'm like, comfortable, comfortable. And if the other person is meeting me in that comfort, it's like, yay, a party! And then when I start to see or think, I see because I don't always know.

00:04:50:14 - 00:05:06:05

Luna

I don't always trust my own ability to read the social signals. But if I start to see the shutdown, I am still at the point in my journey where I'm practicing kind of chilling out and offering that education without like trying to force feed someone, you know. And so that's kind.

00:05:06:05 - 00:05:07:03

Hannah

Of where, like, that's.

00:05:07:05 - 00:05:25:15

Luna

That's the curve. I'm, currently attempting to go around and again and again without falling off. I would love to hear in your personal and maybe also professional life, how have you noticed societal norms affecting either your relationship and or personal pleasure, and maybe also the intersection?

00:05:25:17 - 00:05:56:02

Hannah

I noticed the salon norms. Like I grew up in a really progressive neighborhood. I had like a wonderful upbringing and even though I had such access to free thinking, societal norms still permeated their way. And at a young age, and I even remember in middle school, wearing a shirt that showed my midriff and that like, teachers freaking out and, like, asked to change.

00:05:56:02 - 00:06:00:08

Hannah

And for me, I was like, Lee. I like felt good in my body.

00:06:00:08 - 00:06:03:09

Hannah

I thought I looked good, like I thought my outfit was so cute.

00:06:03:09 - 00:06:14:01

Hannah

I wasn't like trying to do anything bad, but it was so interesting that at such a young age, you feel the powers that be being like, no.

00:06:14:01 - 00:06:14:18

Hannah

No, no.

00:06:14:20 - 00:06:32:22

Hannah

Don't do that. Don't be something that could be powerful and hot and amazing and that would impact my shame meter. But then also piss me off so it would make you want to do it again to be like, what I'm doing isn't hurting anyone.

00:06:32:22 - 00:06:37:06

Hannah

Double areas like. Sorry.

00:06:37:08 - 00:07:06:07

Hannah

Yeah. Definitely firing. And so from my I realized for societal norms, my pleasure with my female anatomy was not something celebrated. And I was like, this is BS. And so again, it took me a while as I was building this brand to reflect on that, to be like, oh wow, this business is such an opportunity for me personally to be like, f the world.

00:07:06:07 - 00:07:08:23

Hannah

Like, this is like.

00:07:09:01 - 00:07:34:23

Hannah

It down to like our bodies being on the ballot. And like this. We from a pleasure standpoint, we are so far behind and I know this stat has been going around a lot or this, piece of education that, people of color, female anatomy, they weren't required in clinical trials until 1993. So just like our bodies didn't matter.

00:07:34:23 - 00:07:50:14

Hannah

And for me, that trickles down into pleasure. Like our pleasure didn't matter because nothing down to, like, products that were being made for pleasure. Which is why we started making lube. Because lube is a stigmatized and B hasn't been made through the lens of.

00:07:50:16 - 00:07:51:18

Hannah

Vulva or.

00:07:51:20 - 00:07:52:17

Luna

Pleasure.

00:07:52:19 - 00:07:55:19

Hannah

E yeah.

00:07:55:21 - 00:08:28:12

Luna

Ding. There's so much to unpack there. I also always think about like if the trials were required on men and women, you know, those of us who are neurodivergent, like, I wonder how much sooner we might have found some stuff out. You know, and and that, too has affected my personal pleasure, my, like, formation in this world. And, you know, kind of just reflecting on all the, all the different ways that we get told we are like bad and wrong or out of line or, you know, thinking about you as a middle school or being like, I am empowered or, you know, do you remember feeling like sexy as a middle schooler?

00:08:28:12 - 00:08:37:04

Luna

Was that even part of the concept? Because it was such a weird experience for me to be, like, told that I was being sexy and I was like, I'm what am I?

00:08:37:04 - 00:09:02:13

Hannah

Do I remember? But I also remember being like, I'm not doing this for other people. Like I remember being like, I look like I like this made me feel. But other people were like, oh, you're tempting people or this is inappropriate for school. So I remember I wore like a cropped halter top a few weeks later and like, wrote an essay to, like, read out to the class.

00:09:02:15 - 00:09:05:06

Hannah

That and my.

00:09:05:06 - 00:09:07:07

Hannah

Teacher was like.

00:09:07:09 - 00:09:10:02

Hannah

Okay, I'm like, what? Are you going to get.

00:09:10:02 - 00:09:11:20

Hannah

Me in trouble? Like, this is a narrative.

00:09:11:20 - 00:09:14:06

Hannah

I'm this is I'm practicing.

00:09:14:06 - 00:09:17:09

Hannah

This is English class.

00:09:17:11 - 00:09:39:17

Luna

I love that. Okay, so on the note of pleasure and empowerment, what do you personally need in order to feel excited to connect with someone? And I know you're in a long term partnered relationship, so I would love to hear, like from the beginning what it looked like and then maybe like day to day, but then maybe even also as a business person, like, what is it that got you excited to connect with personal fave?

00:09:39:17 - 00:09:42:06

Luna

Go three layers to the question.

00:09:42:08 - 00:10:10:14

Hannah

Which I like. I'm going to try to tap on all of them. With my relationship, I remember knowing that we were a match really early on because of the comfort and ease that came with it. And that to me, is so pleasurable when you don't have to force a connection. It almost felt there was almost some type of innocence to it to when we first started dating.

00:10:10:14 - 00:10:25:17

Hannah

And I was like getting like blushy and butterflies instead of, you know, sometimes I'm very out there and over and I was finding myself shy in a way, because I was. So it's like the cheesy thing where I would, like, see his name pop up and I'm.

00:10:25:17 - 00:10:33:08

Hannah

Like, oh my God, I'm dating. You texted me and I was so.

00:10:33:08 - 00:10:57:18

Hannah

Before I met my partner, like, I'm not really that into like feelings. I was more just into the, the pleasure of it all. And so that's yeah it was not a relationship person. And then this like changed my world and I was like, oh wow. The comfort and the ease that you have with like a true partner is the truest pleasure.

00:10:57:18 - 00:11:17:21

Hannah

And that's like it's into our brand to like, we want to empower people to prioritize their pleasure with clean products. But also like, what does how do we define pleasure? It doesn't have to be in the bedroom all the time. Like, how do you find these glimmers of pleasure that you then bring in to the bedroom for intimacy?

00:11:17:23 - 00:11:25:22

Hannah

And, from a business standpoint, it's really fun to when you're like, investing to old white men and trying to have this conversation.

00:11:25:22 - 00:11:28:09

Hannah

What does mean?

00:11:28:11 - 00:11:32:17

Luna

What is that been like? Can you give us is there something you feel comfy sharing with us?

00:11:32:19 - 00:11:55:21

Hannah

This there have been, oh, well, you get a lot of interesting feedback because we're we're bootstrapped right now, pretty much. We have some a little bit of funding, but we're trying to fundraise more so we can sell more product to people everywhere. Yeah. And you know, you get your stereotypical old white man in suits conversations and they just want to see the margins and the bottom line and all of that.

00:11:55:23 - 00:12:12:05

Hannah

But they also are curious from the storytelling standpoint, you know, the ethos of the brand. And people have been like, good luck with your project. This is, oh, how sweet. Or people will say, like, this is really niche. And I say, that's so interesting.

00:12:12:05 - 00:12:14:11

Hannah

Let's just unpack me.

00:12:14:13 - 00:12:16:14

Hannah

A second.

00:12:16:16 - 00:12:16:18

Hannah

And.

00:12:16:22 - 00:12:23:13

Hannah

I'll be like, instance, do you know 1 in 3 vulva owners requires lube for penetration.

00:12:23:15 - 00:12:27:03

Hannah

30%. Does it you do it.

00:12:27:05 - 00:12:32:08

Luna

Do you know how many people like having sex that involves a vulva? Is that me?

00:12:32:08 - 00:12:37:19

Hannah

Chanel got here like it's so, so interesting.

00:12:37:19 - 00:12:59:01

Hannah

So some people will, like, only look at it through like a health care lens. And then it's super refreshing when you get more progressive, newer age, high net worth individuals who are like, okay, we get this. Like, this is like also this has been around for decades. It's not like we have this revolutionary idea. It's just we're trying to give another option for people.

00:12:59:03 - 00:13:12:18

Hannah

So it's very refreshing when you find those people. And then my business partner and I sometimes after meeting like a one that I wear, they say it's too niche. We have to like take a B and be like, we are so happy. We are not those people.

00:13:12:20 - 00:13:13:13

Hannah

Yes.

00:13:13:15 - 00:13:21:21

Hannah

One time a guy told us, I just learned you can, women compete with a tampon in.

00:13:21:23 - 00:13:24:23

Luna

Oh, wow. Okay.

00:13:25:01 - 00:13:26:03

Hannah

Anatomy lesson.

00:13:26:03 - 00:13:27:10

Hannah

Got it.

00:13:27:12 - 00:13:30:22

Luna

Damn. Sex ed in this country leaves some gaps.

00:13:31:00 - 00:13:38:01

Hannah

Now they're like, you're the one with the deep wallet, and you don't know how our anatomy works. Wow, wow.

00:13:38:03 - 00:13:39:09

Luna

Holy cow.

00:13:39:11 - 00:13:39:21

Hannah

Oh, that's.

00:13:39:21 - 00:14:01:22

Luna

Wild. Jumping back to relational pleasure for a minute. I would just love to hear a little bit about, like, what? It sounds like you've a really strong connection with your partner, and I would love to hear, like, kind of more in a week to week basis. Like, what do you do to keep your connection alive?

00:14:02:00 - 00:14:25:06

Hannah

We are I am an over communicator and he sees that and he meets me there, which I'm so grateful for because I need whether it's like, did you like that bite of food? Like, I like to know everything that's happening at all times. Where he's definitely more of more like private, reserved and so which I've learned to respect as well.

00:14:25:12 - 00:14:28:13

Hannah

Also understanding each other's love languages.

00:14:28:15 - 00:14:29:15

Hannah

00:14:29:17 - 00:14:45:08

Hannah

Is huge for us. Mine is physical touch and his his acts of service. And we fully like exercise those and daily like I'm like such a snuggle bug and he will bring me coffee in bed every morning.

00:14:45:10 - 00:14:47:21

Luna

That's my dream. Oh my God, that's so true.

00:14:47:21 - 00:15:03:12

Hannah

Lucky lady. That's so hard. How do you. For some it happened. I was like, right there. The day is actually Monday, so it's like, is that like little things like that?

00:15:03:12 - 00:15:26:23

Hannah

You're it's like so hot and it goes such, especially when you have that connection. You never take it for granted. So beautiful it he's huge acts of service. I was away a few weeks ago and I came back and my car was cleaned. I was like, oh. And that's where I'm like, can we touch?

00:15:27:00 - 00:15:31:05

Hannah

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:15:31:07 - 00:15:33:02

Hannah

So we're very, very, very different.

00:15:33:02 - 00:15:52:11

Hannah

He's so introverted and I'm so extroverted. And it it's like I was nervous. I think going into it that I might be too much. And he was like, I, I love it. You have this like confidence. And that's what drew me to you. Yeah. I was like, okay. Oh cool. We make we're yin and yang.

00:15:52:13 - 00:16:08:13

Luna

Oh fuck. Yeah. Okay. I always also like to ask people what their health and safety practices are like. What do you need to feel safe for the lover? So maybe from the perspective of a partnered person, give us an answer. And then from the perspective of your business, give us an answer.

00:16:08:19 - 00:16:34:14

Hannah

Okay. Love that. Consent is forever sexy. I think it's the hottest thing ever. So in my own relationship and like what we preach as a business like consent is so hot. Getting tested, so hot. Like, I think to me, if you're confident in, like, those aspects, then you you're just a badass. There's and again that that helps the shaming meter I believe too.

00:16:34:16 - 00:16:40:18

Hannah

In my personal relationship I.

00:16:40:19 - 00:16:42:22

Hannah

Gotta be but.

00:16:42:22 - 00:16:47:00

Hannah

I give like my cues are always like, okay, biggest like.

00:16:47:00 - 00:16:57:19

Hannah

Let's let's go. Dude. Very vanilla, very cheesy, but like, that's like my heart. Yeah.

00:16:57:21 - 00:17:04:23

Luna

But also saying what you want directly is so difficult for so many people. I talked to and even me, sometimes completely.

00:17:04:23 - 00:17:20:04

Hannah

So I get like, I am so direct, even if it's like cute and cheesy because I'm like, this is what I want. And this and meet me there. And so I that's just like are forever big. Kiss is like, okay, we know it's time.

00:17:20:06 - 00:17:24:11

Hannah

And so corny.

00:17:24:13 - 00:17:34:01

Hannah

But then as a business like especially, we get people who reach out to us all the time being like, how do I incorporate lube into the bedroom? What do I do? Is it so.

00:17:34:01 - 00:17:35:01

Hannah

Awkward?

00:17:35:06 - 00:17:41:05

Luna

Oh, really? Okay. It's been so long since I've been in that world. Yeah. Okay. Sorry to interrupt you tell us more.

00:17:41:07 - 00:18:11:16

Hannah

Yes, please. Because people will be like, you know, I, I'm dryer or I just really like the way lube feels, but I have a new partner and I don't know, like, how to incorporate that in the conversation. And. Stephanie. Stephanie, who's my business partner, we love giving the advice as, like making a date night of it to, like, go to your favorite pleasure store and like, explore together, like what you have tried before, what you haven't tried before.

00:18:11:16 - 00:18:45:21

Hannah

Also, it can be silly, like it doesn't have to be so serious. Like have fun and like if there are awkward bumps along the way like laugh can not take itself too seriously. So it's really interesting. There are people all over the sexual spectrum in terms of preference and also just sexual maturity that we get all sorts of feedback when, but when it's greener or shy or people, I get so excited because I'm like, oh, that's so awesome that you reached out and like, you're want to explore this, like, come, come, come here.

00:18:45:23 - 00:18:49:01

Hannah

And so like, we'd love to have you.

00:18:49:03 - 00:19:01:05

Hannah

So I love being like, hey, get on the same page as someone. And to your point, like, tell them what you like. And if someone doesn't receive that, well, that's not a good partner like you asked all of us.

00:19:01:05 - 00:19:02:13

Hannah

No. See, I've.

00:19:02:19 - 00:19:20:21

Luna

Never yet had a problem because I used to just not really think about lube that often. And it wasn't until I, like, started getting into anal that I started learning more about all lube, you know? And that was years ago, and it's been a minute since I've even, like, had to think about because I just always have it right there.

00:19:20:23 - 00:19:43:19

Luna

And I will say one thing that works really well for me in terms of like, how do I say this when I notice that a partner is not joining me and bringing in lube when we need more, especially if my hands are like not available or busy doing other things. That's when I teach them my sensation favorites and I go, oh, I love feeling this drop.

00:19:43:19 - 00:20:00:20

Luna

And so I make them do sensation play on my pussy by dropping bits of lube right at the top and letting it dribble down. And then, you know, depending on how, personal I get with them, like if we're using. So if I do a cuticle inspection before we do any fingering. So and I always tell them what I'm doing, I'm like, I'm like, let me look at your hands.

00:20:00:20 - 00:20:20:05

Luna

Okay. So like I have some hangnail today. So I would, you know, if you want to I'm comfy with fingers outside, but if you want to go inside, we use gloves, tournaments, night out if we want them to feel softer. Anyway. So I do kind of my whole little spiel and I teach them and it makes really nice sensations that turn me on and I turn it into a sensory play experiment, and then they get really excited about it and use more, you know?

00:20:20:05 - 00:20:30:13

Luna

And then that's also how I have had an instance where people are like, oh, it's too much lube. Because also figuring out if it's a penis owner, where they fall in that spectrum and finding the balance is is key.

00:20:30:15 - 00:20:33:07

Hannah

Yes. Yeah. I love the sensory play.

00:20:33:07 - 00:20:48:10

Luna

It's still fun. Yeah, because then it turns it into a fun game that they get to keep helping me with every time, you know? And then they get to just like, see me squeal every time they like, put drops on like on. Because I really like the actual feeling of it dribbling down. And then they don't. I'm not rushed.

00:20:48:10 - 00:20:59:01

Luna

Right. It's it's an opportunity for both of us to, like, appreciate this thing. So, you know, and I'll do it. I'll do it on their body parts too, sometimes just to experiment. But yeah, I'm like really excited.

00:20:59:01 - 00:21:00:19

Hannah

It's really fun taking mental notes.

00:21:00:22 - 00:21:16:14

Luna

I'm just another question on the note of kind of like I guess it's health and safety kind of in this broader category. Tell us how to understand clean ingredients and what to look for. And really, what does personal fave go a part?

00:21:16:16 - 00:21:28:21

Hannah

Really great question. When we built this brand, we truly built it selfishly because we just couldn't find what we liked on the market. And so like, what was your inspiration? I was like us.

00:21:28:23 - 00:21:34:12

Hannah

So, so pleasure, I liked. And so we.

00:21:34:12 - 00:21:52:00

Hannah

Went, we came with a water base and we have an oil base and the water base we came to market with first, especially when it came to health and safety, because that's condom safe. Our oil base is not condom safe. They're both toy safe. But we were like, let's come to something that is condom safe to market from the beginning.

00:21:52:01 - 00:22:13:12

Hannah

And we just would go like nerds at the sex shops looking at ingredient on many things. And we really didn't like seeing glycerin out there. We really didn't like seeing long words that we couldn't pronounce there. I was like, if I have to Google this and it still doesn't make sense, I don't think I want that near my pussy.

00:22:13:12 - 00:22:37:09

Hannah

Thinking so, and then additionally, not only what we didn't want in there, but we were like, how can we tap into great things that people aren't using? So we looked into eastern medicine and we're like, let's put some ginseng in and horny goat weed and camomile and let's make it edible, but still clean. So it's a little sweet.

00:22:37:09 - 00:22:58:10

Hannah

And that to us was we didn't want a huge long laundry list, but also with water based. We wanted to make sure it was still wet because that can dry out sometimes. And so from vulva owners, the most common feedback we get is that this feels like my own natural lubrication. And to us that so cool to hear.

00:22:58:12 - 00:23:04:00

Hannah

Because sometimes you don't want that extra partner in there like the little. And to my myself.

00:23:04:01 - 00:23:09:14

Hannah

I'm not I don't need that. I don't need to be feeling that. And so to hear people.

00:23:09:14 - 00:23:43:19

Hannah

Who are like, I have had vaginal dryness issues and like this has been a game changer for me, is so cool to hear. And we can't. We're such a small brand, we can't make huge claims. But people have said that the water based formula has helped their male partners performance, which I'm like, oh, terrific, that is wonderful. So really, from an ingredient standpoint, phthalates, parabens, there's so many ingredients out there that aren't regulated, which is terrifying.

00:23:43:21 - 00:24:07:04

Hannah

A geeky fact is, in the EU, it's about probably now more than 1100 ingredients are banned in personal care items. And in the US it's 11 only 11 ingredients. And yeah, only 11 ingredients are banned. And that.

00:24:07:04 - 00:24:08:13

Hannah

Isn't like the.

00:24:08:13 - 00:24:28:00

Hannah

Best. It's like it's it's bananas. What we do and don't regulate here. And so for instance, our lubes like the water base is called a sex serum. And the oil base is called a pleasure oil for a couple of reasons. We can't call it a lubricant because the FDA required that we tested on animals. And that freaked us out because we test on friends and.

00:24:28:00 - 00:24:31:20

Hannah

Family like, I was like, you try this with.

00:24:31:20 - 00:24:49:18

Hannah

Humans. And then, we also like lube. Could be a sexier words for like, let's try sex here. Let's try pleasure oil. Like, I don't want to think that like a K-Y squirt bottle at, like, a frat house that's not hot. And put it in, like, black glass bottles to be like, you don't have to hide this in a drawer.

00:24:49:19 - 00:25:01:14

Hannah

Leave it out on your nightstand, on your counter. Like, leave it with beauty products like, this is chic and powerful. So that's again, like that helps the diffusing of the shame to being like, let it out. They're proud.

00:25:01:16 - 00:25:11:14

Luna

I love that. I love that so much. Also, if anyone in Europe has a very interesting marriage invitation, I'm open, I'm open.

00:25:11:16 - 00:25:19:10

Hannah

I'm open to passport. Just saying. Like, I'm okay.

00:25:19:12 - 00:25:24:21

Luna

Okay, so tell us now, when it comes to sex, what do you think you're the best at?

00:25:24:21 - 00:25:27:03

Hannah

And how did you get to be so good?

00:25:27:05 - 00:25:34:03

Hannah

Yeah, I, I oh, this is obnoxious. I'm really good at everything.

00:25:34:05 - 00:25:35:08

Hannah

And that's great.

00:25:35:12 - 00:25:39:03

Luna

You just go down the list and tell us. I love that answer.

00:25:39:05 - 00:25:45:05

Hannah

I love. I'm really good at everything.

00:25:45:07 - 00:25:49:20

Hannah

And I think I've always been confident in that, too. Amazing.

00:25:49:22 - 00:25:52:10

Hannah

Like the. Oh, wait, because I.

00:25:52:10 - 00:26:01:12

Hannah

I knew from a young age about the pleasure gap, too, in that women don't orgasm as much as men. And I was like, well, that's true, but I'm going to orgasm every time.

00:26:01:14 - 00:26:04:15

Hannah

00:26:04:17 - 00:26:08:06

Hannah

So like, that's out there. And so I like.

00:26:08:06 - 00:26:25:15

Hannah

Genuinely from a young age, it's like if I'm having sex with someone, it's going to be awesome for me. Not to say you have to have an orgasm every time for sex to be awesome, but I also one thing that I think people do not take pride in enough because they're like, I got all these cool.

00:26:25:17 - 00:26:27:22

Hannah

Clips and blah blah blah.

00:26:28:00 - 00:26:30:01

Hannah

Sometimes a classic missionary.

00:26:30:01 - 00:26:33:05

Hannah

Is so delicious and.

00:26:33:06 - 00:26:50:09

Hannah

I am like, let's celebrate that. Like, don't worry, I love a little wild here and there, but like, how would it be like wake up in the morning, have a little missionary sex and your coffee and start your day? Like, to me, that is the ideal morning that I.

00:26:50:09 - 00:26:51:08

Hannah

Could.

00:26:51:10 - 00:26:54:06

Hannah

Replay it over and over and over again.

00:26:54:07 - 00:27:05:12

Luna

I literally interrupted myself earlier from being like, when he brings you coffee, does that then turn into sex? Oh, because I'm like, I'm like, that's such a turn on this.

00:27:05:14 - 00:27:07:14

Hannah

Yes. And that's what I'm like, okay.

00:27:07:14 - 00:27:30:17

Hannah

I have got in. And like on a personal note, I've always had body like dysmorphia an issue, and I thought that was going to be an issue in the bedroom. And I like if I'm connecting with someone on an intimate level, I like trained my mind. I was like, you are connected with this person. They want you, you want them.

00:27:30:17 - 00:27:48:07

Hannah

You are beautiful. Like go, go, go, go. And that to me, I think like I turn myself on when I'm like, okay, I'm high, I'm great at this. Like whether it's whatever position we're and whatever we're doing, like, hello.

00:27:48:09 - 00:27:49:22

Hannah

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:27:49:22 - 00:27:54:08

Luna

How did you train yourself? Was it like a decision and practice or was there any specific event?

00:27:54:10 - 00:28:18:00

Hannah

And yes, because I have like yo yoed in my way. And I was like, okay, I might have, like a bad relationship with this meat suit that we're all in, but like, how I can't let that control everything. So like, I need, I really had to work on my relationship with myself so I could be present during sex too.

00:28:18:02 - 00:28:20:05

Hannah

Yeah, I was important.

00:28:20:07 - 00:28:21:13

Hannah

Wow.

00:28:21:15 - 00:28:42:20

Luna

Also, I love missionary. I think people think that because I am kinky that I like eat vanilla stuff. And I just like to say regularly that vanilla stuff like sensuality for me is the basis of everything, right? Like, I like the crazy stuff because I like sensations and I'm hyper curious, but I also like the way that I'm most likely to come is missionary.

00:28:42:20 - 00:29:02:05

Luna

I'm on bottom legs together. Boom. Like that, you know? And and like that requires a certain amount of warm up and thrusting and that is not to say that I won't be like fucking from down below. I'm very a power bottom, but like, you know, it's like still it's still just beautiful, basic collaboration that I don't know why people make it the butt of jokes so much.

00:29:02:05 - 00:29:04:14

Hannah

But I don't.

00:29:04:16 - 00:29:13:18

Hannah

Probably. And then when people say vanilla, I'm like, yeah, but you'll often have a bad bowl of vanilla ice cream. Like, it's just like it's old faithful, you know, like.

00:29:13:19 - 00:29:17:22

Hannah

Yeah, it's not Rocky Road, but like, it's still delicious.

00:29:18:00 - 00:29:22:12

Luna

All good. Yeah. And it also is the basis of a lot of other ice creams with stuff in it too.

00:29:22:12 - 00:29:25:23

Hannah

So thank you.

00:29:26:00 - 00:29:41:01

Luna

Classic I love it. Okay. So tell us now to whatever degree feels like relevant, how do you learn about sex? Take us through your formative pleasure learnings, maybe starting with when do you first remember hearing about sex?

00:29:41:03 - 00:29:59:15

Hannah

I remember being I had a friend over in fifth grade, and, there's like a cocktail party going on downstairs. We had, like, one desktop in the house. This is the 90s, and dial up internet. And she was like, let's I even think Google is a thing.

00:29:59:15 - 00:30:06:05

Hannah

She's like, let's bitch about sex. And I was like, oh, no, there's grownups downstairs.

00:30:06:07 - 00:30:09:12

Hannah

And, we literally typed in sex. And the.

00:30:09:12 - 00:30:09:23

Hannah

Whole it.

00:30:09:23 - 00:30:13:01

Hannah

Was for like every virus in the world, we're just like.

00:30:13:01 - 00:30:35:18

Hannah

Take over your computer. And I was like, no, I think this is going to be horrible. And I remember, like, crying to my mom the next day, I was like, I have a confession. She was the one. And I, like, told her I was like researched sex. And she was like, oh, she was like, felt so bad. I was like so ashamed.

00:30:35:19 - 00:30:37:01

Hannah

I'm like.

00:30:37:03 - 00:30:43:12

Hannah

Not like laughing at me. Probably. She was she's like, my ten year old is hilarious or.

00:30:43:14 - 00:30:46:02

Hannah

But like, she I think.

00:30:46:02 - 00:31:05:08

Hannah

Was like probably in her mind I can't speak for her. But being like, hey, this is so sweet and innocent, but also like be this poor girl like has to like confess that she was like curious and like explored and like is crying that like it was bad. And she was like, it's fine. Like what? What were you curious about?

00:31:05:08 - 00:31:14:15

Hannah

And she was just so nice. And I was like, oh, okay. I'm not sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

00:31:14:17 - 00:31:20:16

Hannah

It was cool. It was a lot of stuff, you know, like, but understanding, like.

00:31:20:18 - 00:31:33:15

Hannah

Like an innocent kid, like telling an adult, telling her mom, I. Because I'm just, like, honest to a fault. So I was like, I have to tell her that this is, like, probably her computer is going to break down.

00:31:33:17 - 00:31:37:00

Hannah

Like, from all the viruses that I brought onto it.

00:31:37:02 - 00:31:57:13

Hannah

And then her like immediately being like, it's okay with such like, I know that not every kid parents would have that reaction. And so it was really reassure because I was like, okay, cool. I'm going to continue to be curious and like not a lot about it. And then I was like, I think, by the way, mom, I have a crush on like four different people at school.

00:31:57:17 - 00:32:02:17

Hannah

And she was like, okay, cool, go on. Like, like really awesome.

00:32:02:18 - 00:32:07:14

Luna

That's beautiful. So that kind of like, did that lead into a talk? Like was there did you get a parent.

00:32:07:19 - 00:32:08:16

Hannah

That was never really.

00:32:08:16 - 00:32:31:09

Hannah

Formal talk, but she was always just like safety. Like she wasn't like explicit like tell me what to do, what not to do. But also, you know, I'm her baby. She told me to protect myself and my heart and my body. And so she it's like, I don't know, I'm not a parent, but, like, how do you empower?

00:32:31:09 - 00:32:47:08

Hannah

I'll be so curious if I become a parent one day. How I empower my child to, like, protect their heart and their body, but also explore things safely and like not be ashamed. And so I got lucky.

00:32:47:10 - 00:32:52:00

Luna

I love that. Do you remember any sex ed lessons you got in school?

00:32:52:02 - 00:32:58:11

Hannah

Yes, and I remember, everyone just laughing the whole time and like the part.

00:32:58:13 - 00:32:58:21

Hannah

The core.

00:32:58:22 - 00:33:01:20

Hannah

Teacher was like, I'm trying, you guys.

00:33:01:22 - 00:33:03:23

Hannah

He and the.

00:33:04:01 - 00:33:33:18

Hannah

Girls and boys were separated. I remember that, for me, I'm curious if that is still the case. Because it also made it seem so hetero, which is I, which I am, but I have so many queer friends that I'm like that just. Did you feel like, weird like that? You had to like it was such a girl boy situation.

00:33:33:18 - 00:33:55:17

Hannah

From an educational standpoint, our education in this country is completely flawed on many, many levels. But like that, even just like the optics of something like that and like those people didn't have a safe space to like that immediate shame that you're forcing on someone to be like, well, it's a girl thing and it's a boy thing. Girls, boys go together.

00:33:55:20 - 00:34:01:01

Hannah

This is taboo. So let's talk about it separately. And I'm like, this isn't educational.

00:34:01:01 - 00:34:01:23

Hannah

This is just.

00:34:02:00 - 00:34:05:03

Hannah

Just instilling fear. And like, that's not cool.

00:34:05:05 - 00:34:05:06

Hannah

Yeah.

00:34:05:09 - 00:34:18:03

Hannah

And so yeah, I and was like, it's totally okay for kids to like, laugh and be awkward and giggle. I welcome that, but I just hate that the basis of it was like so hetero.

00:34:18:05 - 00:34:19:03

Hannah

Yes.

00:34:19:05 - 00:34:31:03

Luna

It's also so funny because it's like, I mean, just speaking from personal experience, like it's still kind of hard for the queer ones because it's like, oh, it's like it's not like it removed all of my, like, romantic targets.

00:34:31:05 - 00:35:07:18

Hannah

Really. Like really. And so I hope that it's just blended classrooms and that it's also pleasure focus like I never I don't remember so I can't say I networks. I also probably like thought I was too cool in like talking to her in class and being like, I don't need this education or whatever, but I hope that along with safety and health, there is pleasure being taught to and that that is a good thing and that it's like you don't have to apologize for experiencing pleasure.

00:35:07:19 - 00:35:13:13

Hannah

Especially when it comes to masturbating. Are you kidding? When you're middle school and high school, you're like, well, that feels wild.

00:35:13:13 - 00:35:16:00

Hannah

Like what's happening and it's like.

00:35:16:01 - 00:35:17:08

Hannah

Is that is that okay?

00:35:17:08 - 00:35:18:10

Hannah

Are we allowed to do this?

00:35:18:10 - 00:35:32:13

Hannah

So I hope that is celebrated as well for education moving forward. But yeah, I again, I went to a very progressive school and I don't remember being like empowered in that way.

00:35:32:16 - 00:35:50:22

Luna

Yeah, yeah yeah. It sounds like it's really hit or miss depending on where you are and who exactly is doing the teaching. It also sounds like you discovered your body at some point during these younger years. Will you share whatever you feel comfy about that, like the personal exploration, and then maybe segue into partnered experiences?

00:35:51:00 - 00:36:05:14

Hannah

Yes, I remember in middle school a friend being like asking me if I ever masturbated. And I was like, why? I was like, didn't know what she meant. I guess I also also I thought that was something only boys could do.

00:36:05:16 - 00:36:08:00

Hannah

I why?

00:36:08:00 - 00:36:13:01

Hannah

I was like, I thought, like, I was just jacking off. Like, I didn't know that I could do that.

00:36:13:01 - 00:36:15:20

Luna

I can jack off to like.

00:36:15:22 - 00:36:16:15

Hannah

But.

00:36:16:17 - 00:36:43:02

Hannah

And so I remember, I remember being really timid and, like, shy. And I think, again, societal norms must have been creeping in on me being like, this is has to be a secret, like, you can't do this. And I remember exploring and I was like, oh, this feels wonderful. And but again, I remember like, is it okay that I'm doing this and having that in my head?

00:36:43:03 - 00:36:51:08

Hannah

And I was like, why would something that feels good that I'm not hurting anyone and not putting myself in danger be bad?

00:36:51:10 - 00:36:51:12

Hannah

Yeah.

00:36:51:13 - 00:37:23:06

Hannah

My head. What's wrong with that? And if you've ever watched Mad Men, there's a really interesting episode with Kiernan Shipka when she's, like, eight touching herself and, like, the amount of shame she's like, it's brought on her. Oh, we have to find what season an episode that is. But I was like, like, that was so cool that they filmed that, first of all, and like, explored that, but then like seen it was like the 50s and 60s, like she got so much and then like, see, like patterns, people, patterns people.

00:37:23:06 - 00:37:25:04

Hannah

So yeah.

00:37:25:06 - 00:37:33:11

Hannah

Very interesting. And then with a partner, I remember being so excited and like so ready and like.

00:37:33:13 - 00:37:34:17

Hannah

Let's do business.

00:37:34:17 - 00:37:38:23

Hannah

My it's called boyfriend. He's actually getting married next week.

00:37:39:03 - 00:37:43:14

Hannah

Oh know that.

00:37:43:16 - 00:38:00:14

Hannah

But I remember I also was nervous and I remember I was like, yeah, it's time to say I like, had, multiple shots of Southern Comfort before, and.

00:38:00:16 - 00:38:03:23

Hannah

Haha. Which is a.

00:38:03:23 - 00:38:04:23

Hannah

Disgusting liquor.

00:38:04:23 - 00:38:08:16

Hannah

Bottle, like, and I.

00:38:08:16 - 00:38:10:14

Hannah

Was like, okay.

00:38:10:16 - 00:38:13:21

Hannah

Like a little more relaxed, but it's like.

00:38:13:23 - 00:38:28:18

Hannah

So funny that even for my first time as a teenager, like I was taught or just my mind was taught to like take the edge off in order to, like, feel comfortable, even though I knew I like.

00:38:28:20 - 00:38:29:16

Hannah

People are attracted.

00:38:29:16 - 00:38:47:21

Hannah

To this person and really wanted to do it. Because my my business partner Stephanie, she doesn't drink and it's been so interesting to see in dating scenes in LA in New York around that drinking comes so much with like dating.

00:38:47:21 - 00:38:50:21

Luna

Totally same. I'm like.

00:38:50:23 - 00:39:00:04

Hannah

I need to drink coffee. Yeah. Oh, like so here's before noon so I can still sleep at night.

00:39:00:06 - 00:39:21:22

Hannah

Literally, literally. So it's so interesting that like my first experience, I was 1,000% a drunk teenager. I mean, it's not like I don't remember it and it was a pleasure, but it was so fun. I loved everything about it. But yeah. Yeah, it's I was so safe. It was great. But it's so interesting that alcohol plays such a role.

00:39:21:22 - 00:39:28:14

Hannah

Or we've been taught that it plays. After all, it's like, oh, loosen up, take the edge off. And I'm like, guys, have you read sober sex is fucking awesome.

00:39:28:16 - 00:39:35:05

Hannah

Like you're actually present, like you can feel your body and like it's wonderful.

00:39:35:05 - 00:39:55:07

Luna

I totally yeah, wait, I just want to insert a story here because I totally remember the first time that I was like, on dating apps, I met someone who's cute, who is nice. You know, we got a lot. We we went on a couple dates, and on my first date, he was like, yeah, I mean, I love that you don't drink because I've been really wanting to try sober sex.

00:39:55:09 - 00:40:08:13

Luna

And this was right, I was 30. Yeah. Like this was like a few years ago, like I and I was like, I was like, yeah, I would try that with you. He's like, that's something I've really been wanting to do, you know? And that was, that was a moment where I had to like.

00:40:08:15 - 00:40:09:02

Hannah

We can do.

00:40:09:02 - 00:40:09:11

Hannah

That.

00:40:09:13 - 00:40:27:07

Luna

I had to catch myself to not, like, offer a bunch of judgment because of my surprise. And I was like, yeah, I would love to help you try that. I was like, I have all sober sex, you know, like like it was really, really edgy for me the first time that I ever, like, eat an edible and had anal.

00:40:27:07 - 00:40:44:16

Luna

Do you know what I mean? Like, I was like, oh my gosh, can I really consent? Technically speaking, I guess not. But, you know, I was with someone at that point that I felt really, really, really, really, really, really safe with, you know, and, and it's it's also been interesting even going to certain play parties around L.A. that are kinky.

00:40:44:16 - 00:40:56:20

Luna

And there's alcohol allowed, like it's like BYOB. But I'm like, for me kink and substances do not mix like kink is the substance. Like that's where endorphins are coming from. And it says especially as a bottom, I'm like, I do.

00:40:56:20 - 00:41:01:20

Hannah

What anyone else does from substances. Oh yeah. You're like.

00:41:01:22 - 00:41:24:00

Hannah

I need the oxytocin to like be authentic through throughout this experience. It's crazy. And like, I just I feel really lucky, though, that we live in LA. We're sober and sober, curious is more celebrated. But I think about like, other states throughout the country where you're just like the norm is also, it's just like it's in movies. It's in shows.

00:41:24:00 - 00:41:26:01

Hannah

You're like, go on a date, get a drink. You hook up.

00:41:26:01 - 00:41:26:23

Hannah

Oh my God, let me do.

00:41:26:23 - 00:41:34:20

Hannah

Last night. Like it's just like, that's the narrative and it's that. How do we shift that? Because it's us. It's just not real.

00:41:35:00 - 00:41:53:23

Luna

Totally. Yeah. And every time I read a book where, like, a cocktail is romanticized, you know, I get it. Like writers love to do their thing and words are beautiful. And at the same time, I'm like, they did a study, too, on the type of food that is shown onscreen in TV and movies. There's like very little healthy food.

00:41:53:23 - 00:42:11:19

Luna

So one of my I'm like, should I just should I just take pictures of everything I eat? And, you know, should that be part of my creative lifestyle? Things are maybe I don't know, you know, because because those examples are important for people in terms of normalization, we just learn by example. That's why these conversations are so important for me because I'm like collecting data.

00:42:11:19 - 00:42:12:08

Luna

Yeah.

00:42:12:10 - 00:42:19:11

Hannah

It's literally like we wake up, we're on our small screen them all day groaner medium screen. And then at night we have the big screen and we're just.

00:42:19:11 - 00:42:22:17

Hannah

Observing all of this, all these.

00:42:22:17 - 00:42:24:23

Hannah

Images. And they like whether we realize or.

00:42:24:23 - 00:42:28:12

Hannah

Not all of these things are telling us what the norm is.

00:42:28:14 - 00:42:42:14

Hannah

And I'm just like, I feel so much for so many people that are like, that's not my normal. Yeah. And I feel it. I need to fit in that box. You do not at all celebrate you.

00:42:42:16 - 00:43:01:03

Luna

How did you learn all of that? You know, to go back to partnered experiences and learning about sex? It sounds like you always have had maybe a very strong sense of self, which is very areas of you, you know, but is there anything else to it like was it just something you got to practice? Like what? What else would let you know where your own pleasure was?

00:43:01:05 - 00:43:12:13

Hannah

Well, in true Aries fashion, whenever I've been heartbroken, rejected, I am pissed.

00:43:12:15 - 00:43:28:14

Hannah

So I use anger and I'm like, okay, how do I reclaim this situation? I'm like, I'm not like the one that's going to like, cry and like, but it's definitely is a triple water sign to be like, no different. And sometimes.

00:43:28:16 - 00:43:31:11

Hannah

You're like, Hannah, you need to slow down.

00:43:31:13 - 00:43:32:17

Hannah

Because I'm like, okay.

00:43:32:19 - 00:43:35:15

Hannah

We just got to know, let's keep going. She's like, I need to process that.

00:43:35:15 - 00:43:41:22

Hannah

And like, what do you mean? I'm like, oh, we're different. Right?

00:43:42:00 - 00:44:07:07

Hannah

But it's like to continue to find that like, self is I fuel. I like, learn from excellent mistakes, misjudgments. I've had past experience, painful moments where I'm like, okay, cool. I hate feeling this way. I'm going to reclaim this narrative. I'm going to make sure I'm going to not repeat behaviors that I didn't like, the way I showed up and not trust.

00:44:07:09 - 00:44:30:07

Hannah

I'm guarded. I'm an Aries, so I'm like, I want to assume positive intent from people. But also if someone has hurt me, I'm going to reclaim that. I'm not going to let them have that power. And I'm going to channel it back into myself. And like, I just have to because I've have been like rejected, ghosted, broken up with, friendship.

00:44:30:07 - 00:44:37:08

Hannah

Right. So I've had those two. Those are, those are worse than romantic breakups. I definitely mourn those more than like a romantic.

00:44:37:08 - 00:44:39:05

Hannah

Breakup because I'm like, yeah.

00:44:39:05 - 00:45:01:10

Hannah

I'll find another deck. But like with friends, it's like, oh shit. And so I'm like, okay, I feel this sadness, this betrayal, this revenge, and I am such a strong person. How do I how do I shift? And for me, it's just like getting back in my body and being like, okay, moving forward, I'm glad I'm not that person.

00:45:01:12 - 00:45:10:20

Hannah

I also I'm like, so corny. I read The Four Agreements all the time, and if you don't know the Four Agreements, I'll probably butcher them. Right now I'm on the spot putting myself on the spot.

00:45:10:22 - 00:45:12:00

Hannah

00:45:12:02 - 00:45:39:09

Hannah

That's okay. Being impeccable with your word, doing your best. Don't make assumptions and don't take things personally. And so not taking it personally and not making assumptions are the two hardest ones, for me at least. And so using that in like my personal, professional, sexual, intimate relationship world has been a game changer for me. Because when I feel myself slipping, I'm like, okay, back to the Four Agreements.

00:45:39:09 - 00:45:45:21

Hannah

Yeah, I'm not good with this. Personally, I'm not gonna assume that this person meant to make me feel like shit.

00:45:45:23 - 00:45:47:11

Hannah

And I'm going to keep going.

00:45:47:13 - 00:46:03:13

Hannah

And like, you have to have like the cheesy munchies for yourself or else. And you also have to as, like, serious and like, so fiery and tough like that, I'm being. You also have to laugh at a lot of situations too, because yourself too seriously, you're just going to crumble.

00:46:03:15 - 00:46:22:16

Luna

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get too brittle when I get so, like, uptight and I feel like I'm going to crack. But if I'm remembering that, I'm probably doing my best right now. Otherwise I'd be doing better. Like, it's just like where I'm at right now, today. And I feel like I have the opposite problem with assumptions, though. My whole life long I've been like, I don't have any.

00:46:22:21 - 00:46:44:08

Luna

Like, I don't know, every word can mean so many different things. When you say a sentence full of so many words, it has infinity permutations. And I have a lot of people that are like, you know, and in a conversation I'll be like, I do not necessarily know. I don't know that I know, you know. And that to me is when I get a lot of people to be like, you are an over communicator and then labeling me.

00:46:44:10 - 00:46:55:00

Luna

And it's interesting, right? Because the more people I talk to, the more I get more personal stories, the more I'm like, we definitely can't assume anything, you know? And that's.

00:46:55:01 - 00:46:55:23

Hannah

Processing.

00:46:56:03 - 00:47:28:13

Luna

I but also we don't live in a world where we have a culture around not assumption, like we live in a world where we are taught that there is one right way, even though the world with screens and with algorithms is more niched down than ever. And so I have had so many instances lately where I've run into like bumpy, bumpy situations because I can tell that the other person is making a bunch of assumptions I don't share and I don't know how to without like controlling the whole situation and correcting and making them wrong.

00:47:28:17 - 00:47:37:01

Luna

How to kind of get on the same page. So I'm practicing lots of language. Like I think I'm understanding what you're saying, but let me see. You know what?

00:47:37:01 - 00:47:42:05

Hannah

Like I like blah blah blah therapy speak. I'm like, do you mind if I stick a little clarity there?

00:47:42:10 - 00:47:45:04

Hannah

Like.

00:47:45:06 - 00:47:51:10

Hannah

A positive intent, but you sound like an asshole.

00:47:51:12 - 00:47:53:13

Hannah

So I think it's very your.

00:47:53:13 - 00:47:58:02

Hannah

I love the difference of that though, because. Yeah, I've just been so conditioned to assume so.

00:47:58:02 - 00:48:09:06

Luna

Yeah. I mean, we have been and I think there's also probably a happy medium somewhere in there. But like there are certain scenarios where people are like context clues though. And I'm like creative storytelling though.

00:48:09:07 - 00:48:13:16

Hannah

Like I can't like, like the same ingredients can make opposite stories.

00:48:13:16 - 00:48:32:00

Luna

So I have to check in, you know, and I also like the verbal confirmation kind of to go to what you said earlier. I love words, and I love hearing how other people put things in words, because, again, I don't assume I have the same relationship to words that other people do. And and sometimes people think I'm being like a nitpicky asshole when I'm like, well, what do you mean by this word?

00:48:32:00 - 00:48:34:11

Luna

They're like, you know what I mean? And I'm like.

00:48:34:13 - 00:48:36:03

Hannah

Like, no, I don't. That's why I'm like, let's.

00:48:36:03 - 00:48:45:06

Luna

Slow down for a second. And I just want to make sure that I'm on the same page as you, and I'm not sure if I am. So I'm checking in, you know.

00:48:45:07 - 00:48:46:07

Hannah

Words are fine.

00:48:46:09 - 00:49:02:06

Luna

They're so fun. What about in terms of learning about your own turn ons, turn off sensations, toys like you've described yourself as vanilla. How did you learn that? Like, you know, how did you learn more about your own personal desires and self?

00:49:02:08 - 00:49:25:02

Hannah

I in my 20s is like through either committed partners or like times where I was and like feelings and going around, I always made sure I felt comfortable enough to ask someone, do you want to try this? And I just tried a lot of things sometimes, like, people wouldn't ask me and I'd get like a surprise.

00:49:25:02 - 00:49:37:17

Hannah

Finger in my butt, and that's a surprise. But, like, I wasn't anticipating that, but I'm like, oh, I learned that I liked that. Okay, thank you, sir. And like things like that.

00:49:37:17 - 00:50:02:04

Hannah

But I just was like, okay, I want to make sure that I feel comfortable and I'm looking up with someone to be like, let's try this, because I've, I like, love restraints. I like that, I love like that to me is really fun. Especially I think it's even hotter when you're with someone that's like, you're so comfortable and safe with because it's just, like, feels like it's own game.

00:50:02:06 - 00:50:03:06

Hannah

00:50:03:07 - 00:50:11:20

Hannah

That's super duper fun. I'm trying to think if I've, like, tried something and I'm like, I don't really need to do that again. But there have been think like.

00:50:11:21 - 00:50:15:04

Hannah

I'm trying to think no.

00:50:15:06 - 00:50:27:20

Hannah

But it's also like there's not like repeated patterns of a lot of things. Like I'm not an anal person, it's just like, not for me. But then people are like, especially with our CBD oil lube or like, how can you not be.

00:50:27:22 - 00:50:30:14

Hannah

Like, like you?

00:50:30:16 - 00:50:32:00

Hannah

I go try again.

00:50:32:02 - 00:50:38:02

Hannah

I'm like, you know, but it's so interesting for me.

00:50:38:02 - 00:51:01:18

Hannah

And like, I just love exploring. And then with I'm really comfortable with someone like my partner and like, if something's working great, but like, if we want to switch it up every now and then, I'm always down with that. But I just I'm like, I'm more of a routine person, as like boring as that. I'm like, I love my like morning sex, morning coffee, cuddles.

00:51:01:18 - 00:51:04:01

Hannah

Then we get on our phone and do our word games like.

00:51:04:03 - 00:51:07:04

Hannah

It's like, oh my, that's beautiful. No.

00:51:07:06 - 00:51:27:11

Luna

I mean, most humans are routine seeking to some degree, right? I love routines, I also love novelty. What I love about routines is if you do quote unquote, I'm using a quote the same thing every day. Then you get to notice differences and nuances, or at least I oftentimes do. And nothing is ever actually the same to me.

00:51:27:11 - 00:51:51:10

Luna

And so when people say they are stuck in a rut, I'm like, well, as usually for me, a sign of a larger, crinkly feeling, right? Because it's it's a lack of satisfaction with self or a feeling of trapped that's kind of coming from somewhere else. And then I'm seeing reflected everywhere around me. So I am so into routines, especially if, as I hear you talking, I'm like, what would my life be like if I had one person to fuck every day?

00:51:51:10 - 00:52:08:01

Luna

Or as often as we both wanted to, and could just try all the same things or new things were different or I don't know, I don't know. I hadn't really considered that in a while. Like as I'm like, staring down the barrel at possibly 52 days of fucking in general, you know, from whoever I can gather up. But, like what?

00:52:08:01 - 00:52:17:04

Luna

What do you feel like you've noticed in the time that you have had this beautiful, sweet consistency with your lover? Is there a way to put words to that?

00:52:17:06 - 00:52:20:04

Hannah

God, you're making me emotional.

00:52:20:06 - 00:52:21:02

Hannah

No. This is.

00:52:21:02 - 00:52:45:16

Hannah

Like, I love my meat pleasure, too. And, like, really separating that and not feeling bad about that. So I love my toys for me. And, like, having time and like, that doesn't, like, negate any type of pleasure with him. It's just like there's different like, that is my self-love. That's self-care. That's like I need to connect with me.

00:52:45:18 - 00:52:56:07

Hannah

The rest it's just I it's so interesting. I love when, like, the Cher quote, when she's like, I don't need a man, but I love a man type of thing.

00:52:56:07 - 00:52:58:04

Hannah

She's like, they're like.

00:52:58:04 - 00:53:12:17

Hannah

Dessert. They're like delicious. And so it's so fun that the man that I found is also now my absolute best friend. And so it's like, it's so cool every night to slumber party with your bestie.

00:53:12:18 - 00:53:17:00

Hannah

Like, so cute. That's such a great way to say it.

00:53:17:01 - 00:53:23:08

Luna

See, those are the moments where I'm like, this marriage thing could make sense when you put it that way.

00:53:23:10 - 00:53:24:18

Hannah

It's really fun and.

00:53:24:18 - 00:53:27:08

Hannah

I sleep naked every single night. Yes.

00:53:27:10 - 00:53:28:02

Luna

I love that.

00:53:28:08 - 00:53:28:23

Hannah

Yeah, it's.

00:53:29:04 - 00:53:44:02

Hannah

Yes, it's the best feeling. And even if it's like the middle of winter, I have to sleep naked. So, Sam, that I'm telling you, for people who are listening, who are like, I'm a PJ person, like, you're not, take them off. Maybe you are, but just try taking them off.

00:53:44:06 - 00:53:55:10

Luna

I'm like, it's fine if you want to wear pajamas up until I get into bed, then they will come off. I will also remove my pajamas in my sleep if I go to bed with them on like 90% of the time, I wake up and they're off and I'm like, well.

00:53:55:12 - 00:53:56:00

Hannah

No.

00:53:56:02 - 00:54:00:12

Hannah

And we like, I like have lingerie and it can be like fun for playtime. But I'm like.

00:54:00:17 - 00:54:03:15

Hannah

I'd rather be naked. Yeah, same, same.

00:54:03:17 - 00:54:18:07

Luna

Lingerie is fun for pictures and getting people excited. And then and then I need it to come off. And in fact, I get angry if I'm wearing lingerie and they don't take it off because a you're going to like, fuck up this expensive piece of like lace and boning. And then B, I like the sensation of naked. Please.

00:54:18:07 - 00:54:19:17

Luna

Don't you want to see me naked?

00:54:19:17 - 00:54:20:22

Hannah

00:54:21:00 - 00:54:22:13

Hannah

Skin contact?

00:54:22:15 - 00:54:24:19

Hannah

Yeah, yeah.

00:54:24:21 - 00:54:32:02

Luna

What else, if anything, is on your personal erotic bucket list or work erotic bucket list, but whatever.

00:54:32:04 - 00:54:34:18

Hannah

I love that work. Erotic fun.

00:54:34:20 - 00:54:36:00

Hannah

Really fun.

00:54:36:02 - 00:55:00:02

Hannah

A sex erotic bucket list. I think it's more, like I'm not like someone. It's like, ooh, we, like, get in that hotel and have, like, sexy hotel sex, which, like, don't get me wrong, is really fun, but I am, like, learning things about pleasure. Like, still learning things that I don't know. I know there's so much that I don't know.

00:55:00:02 - 00:55:11:16

Hannah

And so it's so fun being in this world. So I just want to discover more. And, it would be really cool to discover more whilst traveling too, because I'm just manifesting that we're going to go to Tokyo, so.

00:55:11:21 - 00:55:13:07

Hannah

Oh yeah.

00:55:13:07 - 00:55:18:23

Luna

Fuck yeah yeah yeah, throw it some other places that we're celebrating you traveling in. Divine timing. Where else?

00:55:19:01 - 00:55:27:12

Hannah

To Tokyo. And Croatia. I'd love to. There's divine timing in there. In Ireland.

00:55:27:17 - 00:55:29:12

Hannah

Yeah.

00:55:29:14 - 00:55:50:12

Hannah

And then erotica. It is such an aphrodisiac, being financially independent. It is such a hard economic world. And so, making our company making a lot of money in an ethical way. Because capitalism is crazy. Yeah. Really fucking hot to me.

00:55:50:14 - 00:56:01:10

Luna

That is. I full heart agree. And that is so hot. I'm also now having visions of you, you know, just doing an experiment of how the lube feels in every different country because maybe it's different.

00:56:01:10 - 00:56:01:17

Hannah

I don't.

00:56:01:17 - 00:56:06:16

Luna

Know, it sounds like you have some control variables that you can, you know, the consistent pieces in place and.

00:56:06:16 - 00:56:07:15

Hannah

00:56:07:17 - 00:56:09:07

Hannah

Are safe travel, safe to nowhere.

00:56:09:07 - 00:56:10:11

Hannah

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:56:10:11 - 00:56:15:23

Luna

That's great. That's great. Do you have plane? Plane size, other three ounces or less ones we have.

00:56:15:23 - 00:56:31:06

Hannah

Yes. They're both one ounce, but they go a little, goes a long way beautifully with liberty or anything so luxurious. And then we have little packets too, that are just so fun. They like, fit with, like, your credit card and condoms. It's really cute in your wallet, so I.

00:56:31:07 - 00:56:32:19

Luna

Fucking love it.

00:56:32:21 - 00:56:36:20

Hannah

And then next month, I don't know when this is airing, so sometime in the near.

00:56:36:20 - 00:56:41:15

Hannah

Future, or maybe it is live now we have.

00:56:41:17 - 00:56:54:08

Hannah

Match intimacy wipes launching. So body wipes for display. They're flushable camomile, aloe. Great clean up and lovely.

00:56:54:10 - 00:57:09:00

Luna

Amazing, amazing. So I would also love to hear what you, in your professional opinion or personal opinion, is there separation? What do you think? We need to make the world a more connected and loving place?

00:57:09:02 - 00:57:10:21

Hannah

Oh god.

00:57:10:23 - 00:57:40:08

Hannah

So much. I honestly think especially we're in an election year, which is so scary. Going back to assuming less, being more curious, I really think people would be more connected with each other if they were more curious about the strangers that they meet, instead of jumping to conclusions and making judgments. Curiosity is so beautiful and just.

00:57:40:08 - 00:57:43:01

Hannah

It's fun to like taking interest.

00:57:43:01 - 00:57:43:17

Hannah

In other people.

00:57:43:17 - 00:57:43:21

Hannah

What a.

00:57:43:21 - 00:57:46:02

Hannah

Concept.

00:57:46:04 - 00:58:09:10

Hannah

Stress is an epidemic. So I also think, like, that's why I love morning sex, too. Because work is hard. It's inevitable. So I'm like, I'm going to start the day with pleasure. And we say all the time at our company, less stress, more sex. So like whether it's with yourself or a partner like or however you define pleasure like, tap into that and prioritize it.

00:58:09:10 - 00:58:32:04

Hannah

Like that's another thing we say, like prioritize your pleasure. Like that is a pillar of self-care. That's wellness. And like that is good for your health. And like, if you can take care of yourself, you're going to show up better and you're going to take care of other people better. So I really think self-pleasure or with a partner, starting your day with some sort of pleasure is so important.

00:58:32:04 - 00:58:45:00

Hannah

And showing up curious about people is also important because it's so easy and there's like, misery loves company. You can be like sarcastic with friends and like cynical and all of that, and that's fine. I hope you can't hear the banging.

00:58:45:00 - 00:58:53:02

Luna

I can definitely hear the banging, but I mean, it is a podcast about banging. So hopefully, hopefully our listeners will be understanding.

00:58:53:04 - 00:58:57:18

Hannah

Thanks guys. Basically, teamwork here is no more sex in the world will be a better place.

00:58:57:20 - 00:59:23:16

Luna

I love that and I have to say it, since I was 27, I made some new life choices to follow my curiosity, support my creativity, and see where it leads. You know I live in love, basically like to live in line with my values. Yeah, and that has led me to asking so many more questions than I ever could have imagined, and like having so much more like wildly fantastic sex than I have ever had before.

00:59:23:16 - 00:59:39:14

Luna

Great. Because up until 27 I was like, this is how come sometimes sex is good and sometimes there's just like, okay. And sometimes it's like, oh, well, if it's bad, I like touches, but like, I think it could be better, you know, like sometimes there's just not. It's like the other person isn't there, you know. And so that sent me on a whole journey.

00:59:39:14 - 01:00:01:12

Luna

And I being curious is my favorite, you know. And for me it really ramps up my excitement too. And now I'm, I'm learning to sort of calibrate and find the balance and either find people who are in compatible ranges. Here's a question specific for you, because you seem like a strong being, like a strong force. Do. Or do you ever like just bull people over with your energy or do you?

01:00:01:13 - 01:00:06:02

Luna

Are you able to calibrate? You are. How do you handle it? What do you do? What is it like? Do they explode?

01:00:06:04 - 01:00:08:08

Hannah

What's your vision that I.

01:00:08:12 - 01:00:25:14

Hannah

I think I'm approachable, but I also know that I'm in your face and a lot of energy. And some people receive that well and some people don't. But if I can see if I'm being too much for someone like I meet you the first time, I'm like, hey, what's up? What's like, tell me everything about you. And they're like, who are you?

01:00:25:16 - 01:00:28:14

Hannah

I'm like, okay, cool, I'm going to take a step back. But I just get so.

01:00:28:14 - 01:00:39:18

Hannah

Excited about meeting new people. But I'm like, tell me everything. Tell me your darkest secret right now. And like, who are you? And so I definitely.

01:00:39:18 - 01:00:39:23

Hannah

Have.

01:00:39:23 - 01:00:41:21

Hannah

Learned. I just turned 30.

01:00:41:21 - 01:00:55:11

Hannah

Four last week that I can like my flavor is not for everyone, which is totally fine. And that's why it's also kind of funny that I ended up with a really reserved, introverted private person because we are.

01:00:55:11 - 01:00:57:12

Hannah

So opposite.

01:00:57:14 - 01:01:02:19

Hannah

Where he's like, you love telling everyone everything.

01:01:02:21 - 01:01:04:12

Hannah

You're like, yeah.

01:01:04:12 - 01:01:05:15

Hannah

It's not fun, like I.

01:01:05:19 - 01:01:12:22

Hannah

Oh, I see boy, oh, he's hot. I'm like, oh, interesting. We're different. But

01:01:13:00 - 01:01:19:17

Hannah

It's like so there are definitely people who are like, pump the brakes. And sometimes I get the message and sometimes I don't.

01:01:19:22 - 01:01:38:11

Luna

Okay, okay. And that's really helpful to hear. It's also so funny hearing you say all of that and reflecting on our meeting, because we were at an event and I showed up and this happens often, I'm like, haha, I'm going to a party or an event or whatever it is. And I'm going like, like maybe I know one person there and then I don't know anybody.

01:01:38:11 - 01:01:55:17

Luna

And then as soon as I get there, I'm like, oh shit, I have to like, actually exist in this physical space now. And so I was like in the midst of, like, calming my nervous system down from, like self-judgment about awkwardness when you walked up and just, like, became my friend at this party, I was like, Thank God there's a friendly person here.

01:01:55:21 - 01:02:05:14

Luna

And so it never would have occurred to me that that level of like energy and openness and permission and you just kept encouraging me to, like, make sure I got a gift bag and like, I was just like, oh God.

01:02:05:16 - 01:02:11:06

Hannah

This swag. Not.

01:02:11:08 - 01:02:28:21

Luna

But it's still funny and I guess not. Maybe not refreshing to hear that you have like, have also encountered people where it's like quote unquote too much. But, I guess knowing that I'm not the only one out there that has versions of that, even with the enthusiasm, because it's like, I guess that's the downside of the enthusiasm and curiosity sometimes, right?

01:02:28:21 - 01:02:31:16

Luna

It's it's like it can overwhelm certain nervous systems.